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Just finished watching all the films in the MCU on Disney + here is my analysis of all the heroes.
Captain America
Self righteous know it all who only has any powers because they injected him with steroids.
Self righteous know it all who only has any powers because they injected him with steroids.
Captain Marvel
Type of person that waits until a problem has gotten out of hand before offering any help so they can look like a hero. Where was she when Thanos first landed on earth? out in space twerking for Aliens.
Type of person that waits until a problem has gotten out of hand before offering any help so they can look like a hero. Where was she when Thanos first landed on earth? out in space twerking for Aliens.
The Incredible Hulk
Typical meat head that has no technique when it comes to fighting. Anybody with basic BJJ skills could probably beat him in a fight.
Typical meat head that has no technique when it comes to fighting. Anybody with basic BJJ skills could probably beat him in a fight.
Thor
Didn't even bother calling his earth girlfriend when he came to visit to help the Avengers fight Loki.
He probably got hoes all over the galaxy he is the superhero version of the rapper Future, a true leader in the field of Toxic masculinity.
Didn't even bother calling his earth girlfriend when he came to visit to help the Avengers fight Loki.
He probably got hoes all over the galaxy he is the superhero version of the rapper Future, a true leader in the field of Toxic masculinity.
Loki
Type of guy that will suggest doing some crimes together then snitch when you get caught. Tekashi 69 of the MCU.
Type of guy that will suggest doing some crimes together then snitch when you get caught. Tekashi 69 of the MCU.
Iron Man
Wishes he was Batman so bad, but has no hand to hand combat skills. Can't do anything if his suit run out of batteries, just a hyped up Elon Musk.
Wishes he was Batman so bad, but has no hand to hand combat skills. Can't do anything if his suit run out of batteries, just a hyped up Elon Musk.
Black Panther
Got beat up by his cousin and on top of that he opened up Wakanda to the Americans. Bro you really think a dude who named himself 'Captain America' is not going to colonise you and steal your vibranium at the first opportunity? Dumb guy.
Got beat up by his cousin and on top of that he opened up Wakanda to the Americans. Bro you really think a dude who named himself 'Captain America' is not going to colonise you and steal your vibranium at the first opportunity? Dumb guy.
Black Widow
A prime example of how below average white people are able to secure high ranking positions. She got in the Avengers because she knows a bit of karate.
A prime example of how below average white people are able to secure high ranking positions. She got in the Avengers because she knows a bit of karate.
Hawk Eye
Bro must have walked off the Lord Of The rings set and into the wrong franchise because how you trying to fight aliens with a bow and arrow? Useless.
Bro must have walked off the Lord Of The rings set and into the wrong franchise because how you trying to fight aliens with a bow and arrow? Useless.
Nick Fury
Type of boss that makes you come into work during coronavirus even though you aren't a key worker.
Type of boss that makes you come into work during coronavirus even though you aren't a key worker.
Dr Strange
Mf viewed 14 million futures and didn't think it would be a good idea to tell us about coronavirus.
Mf viewed 14 million futures and didn't think it would be a good idea to tell us about coronavirus.
Gamora
The idiot knew where the soul stone was the whole time, instead of using it to amass an army of killer zombies for when Thanos eventually comes shes keeping secrets. Dead because of lack of preparation.
The idiot knew where the soul stone was the whole time, instead of using it to amass an army of killer zombies for when Thanos eventually comes shes keeping secrets. Dead because of lack of preparation.
Peter Quill
Mf need to update his playlist, he still listening to music from the 1970's. If he was listening to Future he wouldn't have got emotional and they would have beat Thanos in Infinity war.
Mf need to update his playlist, he still listening to music from the 1970's. If he was listening to Future he wouldn't have got emotional and they would have beat Thanos in Infinity war.
Groot
Doesn't talk a lot. I respect that.
Doesn't talk a lot. I respect that.
Rocket
A true G, you just know he was out doing robberies in his black air forces before all that Guardian of the galaxy nonsense.
A true G, you just know he was out doing robberies in his black air forces before all that Guardian of the galaxy nonsense.
Ant Man
All he had to do was enter Thanos’s ass and expand and that would have killed him. Tony Stark died because he didn't take one for the team.
All he had to do was enter Thanos’s ass and expand and that would have killed him. Tony Stark died because he didn't take one for the team.
Thanos
The guy was clearly a bit crazy but at least he wasn't racist. He was an equal opportunities genocidal maniac. Anyone can get it.
The guy was clearly a bit crazy but at least he wasn't racist. He was an equal opportunities genocidal maniac. Anyone can get it.
Falcon
Hustled the white man out the top position, the first black Captain America. Dr Umar Johnson would be proud.
Hustled the white man out the top position, the first black Captain America. Dr Umar Johnson would be proud.
Wanda
One of the most powerful characters in the MCU but still caused half the population of earth to get snapped because she was in a relationship with a red mac book pro. Proof that women are crazy.
One of the most powerful characters in the MCU but still caused half the population of earth to get snapped because she was in a relationship with a red mac book pro. Proof that women are crazy.
Oh wow, this thread kinda blew up. Hope you enjoyed, stay safe out there we are living in mad time. The key workers whether you work in a shop, or drive public transport or are in the hospital you are the real heroes.
How can I forget Spiderman you ask? Probably because he was forgettable. Can't take a boy who almost got killed by a special effects artist seriously. Mysterios only power was photoshop.
Yes, to anyone who wanna do something like this. Would live to see it.
*love
Listen I don't use Instagram much, I know people are putting screenshots of these on their gram. I don't mind but give a real G some credit when you do. You get me.
The streets been asking why I never included the winter soldier, its because he's a bum not even worth the first cut. Man thought he The Undertaker with his long hair and moody face.
