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I don't have chn but a lot of my friends are starting to&the 'leaving the baby to cry' debate is a sensitive one. Parents that do are branded insensitive/cruel & parents that don’t are coddling. Like many judgments on child rearing- it feels like you can’t win… so...
I’m super pleased to see this new study and it's interesting findings...
Bit of background.. Attachment theory suggests that you have to respond to cries or risk damaging the attachment bond. A 1972 study linked leaving children to cry was associated with more crying and insecure attachment later on.
But then…Learning theory suggests that if you always respond to cries this reinforces crying behaviour, therefore suggesting that you should leave babies to cry to avoid ‘teaching them to cry’….
HOWEVER this new study has found that sometimes leaving babies to 'cry it out' is NOT associated with poor attachment (as found in a v famous 1972 study) and in fact sometimes leaving babies to cry it out results in lower crying frequency and duration later on.
Also, leaving babies to cry it out isn’t linked with low maternal sensitivity. In fact, mothers who were rated as highly sensitive were more likely to leave babies to cry it out sometimes.. and this get to the real heart of it… the point here seems to be..
Parent (or maternal) sensitivity and responsiveness. It’s not about babies being rewarded for crying and learning to cry more, it’s not about babies that are left having damaged attachment.. it’s about parents that know their babies and respond to their needs.
This is really shown in that parents don’t tend to leave newborns to cry. They're getting to know them & learning how to respond to their needs. As babies get older parents can sensitively respond, knowing that sometimes they're alright to be left a while/sometimes they’re not.
Parents are supporting their child to learn to self-soothe sometimes, supporting the development of self-regulation.
The study recommends an intuitive and adaptive approach to parenting.
The study recommends an intuitive and adaptive approach to parenting.
I'd like to dedicate this thread to the lovely @lmscot7 who is expecting a little bundle of joy and loves to rant to me about the lack of clear science on pregnancy and child rearing 
