Oh I see how it is. I make all these cool tweets about my life, hardships and culture, and people yawn. Then, one tweet about America and I'm Captain Popular?

Fine. AMERICA THREAD [Thread]

Hi how are you? That's some weather we're having? Did you see the game last night? I sure loved the part where Babe Ruth kicked the basket ball into the big ass tuning fork

I was thinking I'd take my truck down to Walmart and buy some screening. Gotta put screening on everything

Also look at all this amazing majestic Arizona desert. Most profoundly beautiful place on the planet. Now how do we make the suburbs as ugly as humanly possible? Any ideas? We gotta hunker down on this one y'all.

Also why don't you hold down the fort? You know? Hold it down. Since forts fucking float all of a sudden. That's a saying that makes sense. That's what you're supposed to say. "Remember the Alamo" was actually a post it note, reminding the soldiers to keep it from going skyward.

Also let me tell you something about Kansas: It's not in the middle of nowhere. It's the nowhere in the middle. How ironic huh? We always know what irony is.

Also if you ever get the chance you should check out every single small town that I'm from. That's a reasonable demand.

Oh and you see all those tornadoes around here? Yeah we decided that this is just the right spot to build houses. Nevermind how the majority of landmass in this country is completely uninhabited, we just like to challenge ourselves.

Yeee haw

Also would you like some coffee? We make it transparent over here.

This has been my America thread.

Thank you and have a nice day! Also god bless and thoughts and prayers!