My dear, golden, infuriating, funny brother died this evening. He was 59 and had contracted Covid 19 in his care home. It was vicious. Stay home, wash your hands, practice social distancing. Hug your loved ones if you can, send them virtual hugs if not.

We'd struggled, he and I. The golden teenager I had idolised as a kid was hollowed out by alcoholism. His anger and depression went untreated and we raged at each other from time to time, though always from love. His dementia when it came robbed him of his short term memory

but it also took away the anger and the sadness. He spent the last 2 years feeling content and cared for. He sang again. And danced (he hadn't danced in years) He made cakes - weird because he used to hate cakes - and helped with cleaning which was weirder still.

For a while I had my big brother back. What I learned was that holding onto anger doesn't help. You can burn yourself down with it as he did. But if you let it go there is love & sunlight to be had. I'm so glad he got to lose his sadness & happier still he knew he was loved.

And I had let go my unresolved anger too. It's better, trust me. So wash your hands, stay home if you can, social distance yourself. Let the anger go. Pick up the goddam phone and make it right. Swallow your pride. There's no time