A few weeks ago I had to put out emergency calls to some of my doctor friends and @Dismal_Bismal over a family friend who suffers body dysmorphia and was no longer talking to his therapist. You could swear this guy was perfect but he’s almost dropped out of school because of BDD.

Called his brother to check up on him a few days ago and I was told that he’s been admitted into a psychiatric hospital because it got really bad and they don’t know what to do because there’s an imminent lockdown and his mother won’t be able to take care of him if it happens.

This is someone who’s brilliant af. Scored about 320+ in JAMB and had always been on top of his class before things got bad. Now he’s struggling to stay in school and barely has any friends.

The only people who understand him are his family and some few close-knit friends. Every other person thinks he’s stupid and crazy because “Look at you. What are you even talking about? Your body’s perfect. Stop making up nonexistent problems in your head”.

Some of you can’t understand why celebrities you deem “perfect” went through terrible cosmetic surgeries (to fix their self esteem issues) because you have refused to understand that someone may look perfect TO YOU and still be battling with their self image on the inside.

When people you consider flawless open up to you about their self esteem issues, you think they’re crazy or just making up issues in their head; employ any type of insensitivity available to dismiss and invalidate their problems, making them feel even more terrible about it.

I also hate how dishonest this skinny-shaming conversation can be because some people just lump all demographics together as if our culture doesn’t have a million and one derogatory names reserved for skinny people. As if our standards are entirely identical to western standards.

It doesn’t even cost a single thing to be kind to people and stop poking more holes in their wounds. To you, it’s not a “real problem” but talk to any skinny person who’s been bullied and berated for their weight and watch them uncover the real scars you created.

There’s really nothing wrong in trying not to invalidate other people’s struggles. You don’t wear the shoes; you don’t know if and where it pinches.

Just stop.