Wednesday headcanon thread: What are the #Discworld characters stockpiling?

The librarian: peanuts. Everyone else has stockpiled bananas on his behalf.

Rincewind: Potatoes which he will, regretfully, end up throwing at whoever's chasing him.
The luggage went out and stocked up on *something*, but we don't know what and quite frankly we're too afraid to ask.

William de Worde has stockpiled Sacharissa’s favourite kind of pen because she won’t write without it.
Drumknott has never stopped stockpiling paperclips, and finds his collection very soothing.

The Watch: Dartboards.
Vimes has ordered extra coal for Sybils dragons, using his connections to the dwarfs.

Sybil hasn’t stockpiled anything but is delighted that they’ll finally get around to using up all of the leftovers that need eating.
We thought the Dean was panic buying cheese, but turns out it was just his usual weekly order.

The UU wizards are very pleased about their ample stockpiles. However, Mrs Whitlow informs them that without rationing the chutney, it’ll only last a week.
Granny doesn't hold with this kind of nonsense. She can't help it if people keep bringing her baskets of supplies.

Nanny absolutely holds with this kind of nonsense and has now filled the bathtub with scumble.
The Nac Mac Feegles attempted to stockpile ships* until Tiffany began the tapping of the feet’s.

*Sheep, for the uninitiated.
Susan is very sensible and refusing to stockpile. Quoth the raven tried to stockpile eyeballs and so far has olives, pickled onions, ping-pong balls and no eyeballs.
Angua has bought a barrel-full of Willard Brothers 'Good Girl!' Flea Shampoo (it brings out the gloss, all right?).

Carrot is standing guard at the market to make sure everyone gets essentials. He bought two loaves of bread but felt guilty and donated them both.
The Black Ribboners are nervously stockpiling tomato juice and coffee.

Nobby is stockpiling siege weapons. Nothing to do with the pandemic, he just likes seige weapons.
Gaspode has tried to convince Foul ole Ron et al to stockpile dog biscuits but so far all they’ve managed is old
boots.

The dwarfs are stockpiling gold. They’re still not desperate enough to actually eat the dwarf bread.
Moist attempted to stockpile toilet paper in case it become the new currency. Adora called him an idiot then had golems distribute the toilet paper amongst the needy.

Albert has ample stockpiles of grease. His porridge appears to be stockpiling spoons.
Leonard of Quirm politely requested an extra roll or two of his preferred parchment. He doesn't know Vetinari has a whole room filled with them.
You can follow @MakeYeFretPod.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: