I got my sons school report today and it got me thinking about western markers of “success”.
I mean grades are useful, I guess (before you @ me, I used to be a teacher way back when. This isn’t an attack on teachers at all, but an observation about the system),

but I’m interested in different measures of my kids progress. I don’t know if it’s just me, but what I want to hear from the school is whether my kid is kind. Is he curious? Does he get along well with his peers? Is he funny and witty? Does he try hard?

Does he say good morning to you in the hall? Does he smile when he walks into your class? Is he happy?

My kid is smart. But it’s the kind of smart that schools don’t care about. He’s helpful, friendly, loving,positive. He is a bit of a lad and he’s cheeky, but always respectful

He is insightful. He is empathic. He cares about justice. He tries hard. He’s funny-like proper blak fulla funny.

And today when he looked at his report with me and there was all this deficit language, he just shook his head and walked away.

So, let me break it down for you a bit, with some interpretations and suggestions:

He is easily distracted (actually he’s super curious and social)

He missed a lot of school (we are so pleased he managed to send in every assessment)

He should ask questions if he doesn’t understand a task fully (he’s a blak kid who often is made to feel dumb if he doesn’t understand something)

Seems to produce better work when at home away from the distractions of other students (nope his mum didn’t do his work for him, he just thrives in an environment where he feels safe and valued)

Applied himself to the practical but let himself down in the theory component (he learns by hands on experiences, he is great at doing, just not as confident in explaining it all)

Needs to submit his work on time (ok, I’ll give you that one, with a but....your obsession with measuring time is based on a wholly colonial construction of time and productivity)

So yep, my kid is brilliant. He loves all of his elders and when they come over fusses around them. He cares for his brother and sister, loving them and worrying about them. He brings the washing in without being asked and puts the dishes away.

He thanks me every time I cook him a meal. He loves little kids and babies and is so gentle with them. He’s funny, he’s fit (like super fit) and I think he’s one of the most genuine humans I have ever met.

I mean they could have talked about how he checks in on the other Aboriginal boarders to make sure they are ok. How he puts zooper doopers in the freezer on his wing for all the lads to share. How he developed a brilliant short video about Aboriginal English.

Or how he rallies school pride and goes to every intercol to cheer on his mates.

I mean do they notice any of these things?

Do they actually see him, like really see him?

So yep, the school system might not measure any of his real successes, but I see them. I hope that he knows he is much more than their assessment of him. That he is not the sum total of their reports. I just hope everything i do at home with him is enough to keep him bouyed.

Again, this is not an attack on teachers, some of my best friends are teachers