I don’t know quite what’s going on in the sex blogging community atm, but it seems pretty sad and pretty toxic & I’ve read a couple of good things about how conflict in general can be massively triggering for people, and that (and only that) are what these thoughts are about

Conflict *is* really fucking upsetting. I know this even as someone who will create conflict because they don’t know where else to put their pain. But it destroys me. It makes me physically unwell.

And so, especially in these times where we are all living something incredibly hard, I’m doing my best to avoid conflict completely, even if that is not my natural approach. And I feel so much better for it.

But more than anything, I wanted to share what had worked for me when the community no longer felt like a community, and when I didn’t feel happy or part of it.

I followed people outside of the community.

I know that now, that means I sit right on the fringes of the sex blogging community. There are a variety of reasons for that, but mostly, I’m not only okay about it, I like it.

So consider following people and things you like that aren’t part of the community - authors, publications, artists. Your TL stays interesting, but it minimises how much conflict you see.