Joe Biden’s days must start eerily similar to Lucy’s from the documentary 50 First Dates. Picture it:

Jill leaves a record for Joe so when he wakes up he can put it on the record player.

The record reminds him underwear, pants, and then shoes.

The record reminds him he was VP to “the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy...I mean, that's a storybook, man.”

The record reminds him that Trump was elected over Hillary Clinton.

The record reminds him that he’s running for President, not the Senate again.

The record ends with a NYT news clip that reminds him his unwanted touching, kissing, and sniffing is definitely not sexual misconduct.