It's hard keeping our opinions to ourselves. Especially when one of our alters is so ready to spew his anger. He's so close to conciousness, so talking to him is a bit easier. It feels like talking into pillows because our communication still sucks. (1/10)

But he is able to see what's going on mostly, I know this because I can feel an emotional reaction to things as we see them. A reaction that is not our own.
He's very angry at the state of things online surrounding DID. I'm interpreting it as this: (2/10)

He is angry that allegations have arisen against notable systems. He's angry that these things happened. He's angry that we finally found a community, then it gets torn apart. He is a protector after all, so he just wants the system to be happy and (3/10)

safe. Now that I (Bea) have seen the effects of the controversy, I feel uneasy about connecting with anyone online. I always should have always been on guard, I know. But this community felt safe, filled with others who understood our (4/10)

experiences. After learning about DID, many of our amnesia "episodes" made sense. The voices I heard, the clouded memories, the missing ones, everything fell into place. I contacted a trauma specialist who ended up diagnosing us in a couple months (5/10)

later after weekly, excruciating sessions. It was hard. I came online to find more people with the diagnosis, I felt I had found a place for us to be ourselves, uncensored. We could talk about our "abnormal" experiences without feeling (6/10)

weird or "crazy." I felt good. Then it became apparent that the DID community is just like any other. There is so much hatred boiling in people's blood and hearts. I've seen death threats, doxx threats, and assault threats from systems to others. (7/10)

It is sickening. My system may suffer exponentially from the horrific abuse our family put us through, hell, we don't even remember all of it. But we would never, ever think to harm someone for having differing viewpoints. (8/10)

But many people in this community have no issue doing so. I've seen so many Twitter fits and fights... I am so saddened by it all. Our protector is urging me to delete our account rn. I can hear his muffled words. So if this account disappears, don't (9/10)

say I didn't warn you. Idk what the purpose of this thread is. Just writing some thoughts down I guess. (10/10