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You know what feels ridiculous? When you& #39;re feeling incredibly emotional and you have to question what the reason is because you know- you KNOW because it always happens- that someone else is going to question why you& #39;re emotional. I hate that. It just...(1/?)
(2/?) it makes you feel like your feelings aren& #39;t legitimate when people question them. And eventually you start to ask yourself if they are, or if you& #39;re overreacting. To ANYTHING. I have a page due in four days and have sold NOTHING. Because no one is open. I am upset. >
(3/?) But I& #39;m sitting here just freaking out and trying to convince myself that it& #39;s ok to freak out. There are of course other variables upsetting me- it is quarantine, after all- but I can& #39;t decide if I& #39;m upset ENOUGH. What IS enough, really? Am I too upset? >
(4/?) should I even BE upset? I had Friday off so I shouldn& #39;t be tired of this. That should have been enough. There& #39;s nothing different about this life except that I can& #39;t go SHOPPING or to the office. Nothing different. But the rejection I live with daily is >
(5/?) WORSE because of the world being in the state it is, and I already can barely handle that rejection on a regular day. I& #39;m not worried about my job because I think we& #39;re safe, but that doesn& #39;t mean that failure doesn& #39;t EAT at me all the same. >
(6/?). So maybe it& #39;s time to get out of this, right? I mean, I& #39;d give my right arm to have a job where I didn& #39;t constantly feel like every day was anticipating someone freaking out over a mistake, or miscommunication, or FAILURE. But of course now we can& #39;t get out of anything>
(7/?) because we CAN& #39;T GET OUT. AT ALL. I can& #39;t go find a job when I have no other skills and anxiety that basically makes my days hell and money is important. And my brain, as evidenced by this thread, is basically a fucking free-for-all of thoughts that don& #39;t slow down.
