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How I met and lost my Nigerian husband....
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So this other year..... my gay cousin (Pabi), asked me to visit him ko Vaal (Vereeniging to be exact) before we go home for the holidays. Like he wanted us to groove a bit,,,,, coz yeyyyi cuzy noMgroovo
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😣" title="Persevering face" aria-label="Emoji: Persevering face">.
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😣" title="Persevering face" aria-label="Emoji: Persevering face">." title="So this other year..... my gay cousin (Pabi), asked me to visit him ko Vaal (Vereeniging to be exact) before we go home for the holidays. Like he wanted us to groove a bit,,,,, coz yeyyyi cuzy noMgroovohttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😣" title="Persevering face" aria-label="Emoji: Persevering face">." class="img-responsive" style="max-width:100%;"/>
Fine keh, I get there on a Thursday afternoon. We chill and he tells me how we are gonna paint Vaal red and allhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">.
Fast Forward, comes Friday Evening keh. We bath and he is like "Cuz siyabangena" and I was there hyping him like a clownhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">. You know how some gay people like to be hyped up njalo nje. So I was there keh on some "Yassssss chommie". Siyahamba keh...
. You know how some gay people like to be hyped up njalo nje. So I was there keh on some "Yassssss chommie". Siyahamba keh..." title="Fast Forward, comes Friday Evening keh. We bath and he is like "Cuz siyabangena" and I was there hyping him like a clownhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">. You know how some gay people like to be hyped up njalo nje. So I was there keh on some "Yassssss chommie". Siyahamba keh..." class="img-responsive" style="max-width:100%;"/>
We hit this other well known club called Jika Ma Jika. Kumnandi and all. The jwala I flowing, the music is good, yeyyyi kumnandi.
Did we not get drunkhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😩" title="Weary face" aria-label="Emoji: Weary face">
Next thing we are walking back to his room, drunk AF, we were probably walking like new born giraffes at the streets in the middle of the night. https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">
I honestly don& #39;t remember much of what happened along the way, but what I& #39;m sure of is that we got back to the room safely.
Fast Forward to Saturday morning, we wake up, bhabhalazd AFhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😩" title="Weary face" aria-label="Emoji: Weary face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">, craving all sorts of things like meat and sweetshttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😩" title="Weary face" aria-label="Emoji: Weary face">. So we decide to quickly bath and hit this other Shisanyama around the corner.
On our way there, we bump into these 3 Nigerian guys. And this other one is busy calling me his wife. Was I not confused. And I asked why is he calling me his wife.
He told me that we got married last night, we said our "I do& #39;s" under a certain treehttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">, and they even have a videohttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">. At this point I& #39;m praying that I didn& #39;t do anything stupid.
They show us the video, I didn& #39;t really see what was going on there but I can see that it& #39;s me and my cousin and them and all. My cousin is dying of laugher and he is calling me Mfazi ka Igwehttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">" title="They show us the video, I didn& #39;t really see what was going on there but I can see that it& #39;s me and my cousin and them and all. My cousin is dying of laugher and he is calling me Mfazi ka Igwehttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">" class="img-responsive" style="max-width:100%;"/>
Then we tell the guys that we were drunk izolo, so they shouldn& #39;t take that serious https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">. We all laughed and parted ways keh.
Fast Forward to Sunday, Pabi says we should cook some Sunday platehttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙂" title="Slightly smiling face" aria-label="Emoji: Slightly smiling face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="☺" title="Smiling face" aria-label="Emoji: Smiling face">. So we decided to go to this other stall where they sell fresh veggies and all
On our way there, I hear "MY WIFE-OOO, MY WIFE-OOO". When I turned, it was "My husband"https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy"> and he was with his 2 friends. (Mind you, we don& #39;t know their names)
Pabi dies of laughter every time he sees themhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy"> and mina I& #39;m just there feeling uncomfortable and allhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy"> And at this point all I wanna do is runhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">
Fine keh, we all talk a bit and part ways.
Fast Forward to Wednesday morning,,,,,, my cousin and I were getting ready to go home manje, so we decide to go to this other store where they sell all sorts of sweets. On our way there, we see abafana ba Igwe...... But my husband was not there.
So first thing I asked was "Where is my husband?" (Mind you we still don& #39;t know their nameshttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😂" title="Face with tears of joy" aria-label="Emoji: Face with tears of joy">)
So the other guy says he is dead. And we laughed nje and ask again where is he kanti......for real though.
They told us that he got stabbed to death on Sunday evening on his way to the flathttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">.
I was not okay guyzhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="💔" title="Broken heart" aria-label="Emoji: Broken heart">. That& #39;s how I lost my Nigerian husbandhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">
May his sweet soul continue to rest in peace.
(I STILL DON& #39;T KNOW HIS NAMEhttps://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face" aria-label="Emoji: Loudly crying face">)
I was not okay guyz
May his sweet soul continue to rest in peace.
(I STILL DON& #39;T KNOW HIS NAME
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