I can& #39;t actually think about my own life or any experiences in my life without being overwhelmed by sadness
Even happy experiences, even stuff I& #39;m grateful for
I& #39;m so sick of sadness being the gravity of my emotions and thoughts 1/
I know there are many things I can do against this emotion, right - but the problem is, if I& #39;m doing them & #39;against this emotion& #39;, it means it& #39;s still gravity and I& #39;m just fighting it. But that& #39;s not the same as making it go away? 2/
And therapy can be great at providing you with new ways of fighting, but what about making it go away? I& #39;m talking about CBT as well as psychoanalysis btw. 3/
Drugs can be great at making it go away actually. Depending on the context (sometimes they make it a billion times worse).
But I don& #39;t want to need something external to alter my emotions actually.
Is there no way out of / through this sort of mental illness that can work? 4/
I get the irony of being a psychology student and asking this question, obviously.
But none of this feels like an accute state (mental illness), since none of it is new. It& #39;s always been my gravity and I& #39;ve organized my life around it for as long as I can think back? 5/
And how does psychology offer any cure for feeling existentially inappropriate in life?
Again, I& #39;m not saying this because I& #39;m feeling super-depressed *right now*. I have a crazy lot of ways to cope with it (22 years gave me a lot of time to practice). 6/
I know Twitter won& #39;t offer any answers either but I felt like sharing these thoughts.
I also think I might continue this thread at some point so I& #39;m keeping it open. 7/x
You can follow @anotherxlara.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: