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*deep breath*
Okay, here we go. My testimony about that guy is finally published in full, along with testimony from three more people, and final wrap-up posts from both the survivors and the survivor pod.
Links in thread.
Okay, here we go. My testimony about that guy is finally published in full, along with testimony from three more people, and final wrap-up posts from both the survivors and the survivor pod.
Links in thread.
Update from the pod: https://medium.com/@fv.survivor.pod/a-final-update-from-the-fv-survivor-support-team-f998c893a413
A message from the survivors: https://medium.com/@fv.survivor.pod/a-message-from-the-fv-survivors-3c1ea629af78
All the published testimonies: https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com
I genuinely hope this is the last time I have to talk about or think about that guy. Unfortunately, I expect that's not going to be the case.
I would appreciate help with signal boosting.
#polyamorymetoo
I would appreciate help with signal boosting.
#polyamorymetoo
Coming back to this thread for the weekend crowd and anyone who missed it last week.
I've told my story in bits and pieces in interviews, but this page is the first time I've told it in full. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/eve-franklin-veaux/
I've told my story in bits and pieces in interviews, but this page is the first time I've told it in full. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/eve-franklin-veaux/
If audio is more accessible to you, there's also a Soundcloud playlist of my interviews (edited for clarity/linearity). https://soundcloud.com/itrippedonthepolystair/sets/eves-testimony-franklin-veaux
Or if you want to hear everyone's testimony in order (eight hours of it!) there is a playlist with all the audio available. https://soundcloud.com/itrippedonthepolystair/sets/all-audio-testimony-franklin-veaux
Note three people—Amber, Lauren and Paula—opted to provide written testimony only, so you still have to go to the site to read their stories.
Along with mine, three other new testimonies were published last week. Two of these intersect with mine. A third parallels my experience in uncanny ways.
It's like he was working from a script.
It's like he was working from a script.
"Paula" broke up with him several years before I met him. But she describes financial exploitation, gaslighting, triangulation, lack of polycule boundaries, nonconsensual publication of their sexual activities, and more, leading to suicidal ideation.
https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/paula-franklin-veaux/
https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/paula-franklin-veaux/
"Paula" connected with our process after reading my essay "To the Next One," which she felt also described her experience. https://medium.com/consent-culture-a-conversation/to-the-next-one-e92f62915281
Rose is someone he tried to triangulate me with during our relationship. We connected after the breakup and identified the ways he'd told us different stories, and the ways he was trying to bait her with stories of my "jealousy." https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/rose-franklin-veaux/
My side of the Rose story is told in my episode 3. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/eve-franklin-veaux/episode3/
Marissa, too, had a chance to be exposed to both our stories. Over time, they came to believe that he was lying to both me and them. He also pushed their boundaries.
They were one of the first people to name his treatment of me as abuse. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/marissa-franklin-veaux/
They were one of the first people to name his treatment of me as abuse. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/marissa-franklin-veaux/
My side of the Marissa story is told in my episode 9. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/eve-franklin-veaux/episode9/
To be honest, I don't really know what to think about my testimony, or how it will be received. I am worried about it being so long. I didn't know how to condense the story like the others did. Maybe that's because it was still so relatively fresh.
I worry that it's boring, that there's too much detail, that people won't be able to understand what it's really like.
Then I hear people's reactions and I wonder if it was worse than I thought. If my barometer for what's really bad is just broken.
Then I hear people's reactions and I wonder if it was worse than I thought. If my barometer for what's really bad is just broken.
I wonder if there's any value in my story. Why anyone would bother to read it.
Then I think that it's probably the most detailed account I've ever read of long-term emotional abuse, not just in a polyamorous context, but anywhere. And maybe that has value.
Then I think that it's probably the most detailed account I've ever read of long-term emotional abuse, not just in a polyamorous context, but anywhere. And maybe that has value.
I hope this offers something for people to learn from. I hope it helps people recognize the signs and get out sooner. I hope it stops even one person from going through what I did.
Oh I want to say one more thing. One of the things I've been accused of is somehow manipulating Amber and poisoning her against Franklin. In my episodes 8 and 9, I provide (with permission) the full text of some of the key emails between us. https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/eve-franklin-veaux/episode8/
Readers may judge for themselves how much I manipulated or brainwashed Amber vs. how much Franklin had already poisoned her feelings about him with his own behaviour.
It's not the whole correspondence. But the whole correspondence *was* given to researcher Kali Tal, who wrote about it here. https://medium.com/@kalital/my-life-belongs-to-me-reading-the-polyamory-narratives-of-franklin-veaux-against-the-84be142aa8a1
The whole correspondence was given to Louisa Leontiades, and to every member of the survivor pod. It was given to several members of the Polyamory Leadership Network. It was offered to a former member of Franklin's pod—who declined it.
Not one person who's read it has said I misrepresented it.
So if anyone who reads the testimonies and the supporting documents still thinks we're hiding something...I'd just like you to think about your standards of evidence for us vs. Franklin.
So if anyone who reads the testimonies and the supporting documents still thinks we're hiding something...I'd just like you to think about your standards of evidence for us vs. Franklin.
