I tweeted earlier about loneliess, especially during isolation, but I deleted it because it felt strange to tweet about my mental health. Who am I doing that for? Is it for sympathy, or attention? Why?

But just because it feels odd to broadcast emotions to strangers on the internet, I don’t think that takes away the sentiment. Especially when I’ve been inside alone for 5 weeks now, including 10 days with intense Corona symptoms - what’s the harm in wanting some conversation.

I’ve struggled with my brain for a decade, or more, or maybe less… it really can depend on the day, or even the hours and minutes. You go to work, go for drinks, push it down and you have things to keep your brain occupied - even if they’re not a positive step for the long term.

Living alone in lockdown gives more time for self-doubt - about ageing, being single, am I skinny enough? When can I buy a house? Should I have more friends? Why can’t I cook, knit a blanket, speak five languages and run 10k when everyone else appears to be doing IT ALL.

Anyway, gonna tweet this and probably delete it. i just wanted to see if I could be a bit more ‘open’… more for myself than others, but if anyone has a coping mechanism, please do message! Now I’m off to go and build a Lego Millennium Falcon.

Oh and a reminder to myself (!!) and everyone that what a lot of people put on social media is very false, and shouldn’t make us feel rubbish - although it’s easier said than done.