The problem of Lance Centeno and Via Gonzales is not that they had consensual sex. Neither is it about having done it in a car. Not even that they filmed it.

The problem is the pernicious view that sex is dirty, a shame, a scandal.

Why should the couple apologize? Who did they hurt? What law did they violate?

Those who stole the private video and those who forwarded and shared them should be ashamed of themselves — and be made accountable for violations of the law.

We should stop calling leaked videos of people having consensual sex “scandal videos”. Those are stolen videos.

The real scandal is that the videos are stolen, and that consensual sex is described as “scandalous”.

In our macho-feudal culture, it is always the woman who bears the brunt of the backlash arising from “scandal videos”. Many of those who ask “Why did she have sex?” or “Why allow herself to be filmed?” are the same ones who share or jack off to the videos.

It is unfair to ask people to stop using or taking videos of their consensual sex acts. That’s their right. Many OFWs do it, as well as others in LDR. Nothing wrong with it. They know the risks.

We would be better off if we stop treating sex as a scandal, commodity or weapon.