Old fashioned names are back in style and now so are old fashioned hobbies. In 70 years every kid will once again have a Great Aunt Maude whose secret sourdough bread recipe sustains the family and who cannot be persuaded to part with her cobwebby basement full of canned beets

She’ll also be weirdly obsessed with jigsaw puzzles and repeat her story about sewing masks for The Great Pandemic over and over again even though everyone’s heard it a hundred times by now

Her home will reek of Clorox, of course. Clorox will be the Old Person Smell of this generation. No one will think that’s weird, but what WILL be weird is Great Aunt Maude insisting people used to shake hands in greeting. It won’t seem like a joke but obviously it must be?