Butter on a digestive might make monocles pop out at the Ascot or Montecarlo but- maybe all those poshos who were spanked by nannies through childhood until they were bullied in boarding school before going to murder animals in Africa for fun -maybe they're the real weirdos?

Listen, my mate Cian had a free gaff back in the '90s and he got two goodfellas thick crust pizzas and ate them like a sandwich followed by a whole Romantica.

Be your own soulmate and butter your digestive.

Butter is natural food and less damaging to your body than the artificial shit in your low fat spreads and low fat gluten free fake foods.

A sensible human needs to accept the role of utter chaos in their life, and a buttered biscuit does that. https://twitter.com/Ernekid/status/1249455671667494913?s=19

Listen. If you can toddle into an overpriced brunch joint and ask them to put hollandaise sauce on a poached egg... You can butter a biscuit. https://twitter.com/AnarchoCulchie/status/1249456342806470657?s=19

@theJoeGriffin is he on twitter? https://twitter.com/jdurkan91/status/1249457107029626880?s=19

Listen - butter and digestives get into mischief. No doubt about it. But if you break them up you'll have mayonnaise on digestives and butter on pink wafers.

That is the war we're fighting. That's the line. https://twitter.com/red_razors/status/1249463909674876929?s=19