Compulsory gender socialization is directed at people from birth onward based on what people assume or are told their AGAB is. This is inescapable. Cis and trans ppl both have varying degrees of resistance to internalizing this socialization, but NEITHER have automatic immunity.

Saying "AMAB" as a stand-in for "socialized as male" is clunky but in most cases aside from very recent increase of early-childhood acceptance where the socialization is made neutral or affirming (and most childhood peer groups also affirm), the two map onto each other.

Thinking this is a case of malice or negligence, as opposed to imperfect but for the most part reliable mapping, is an excuse to react to triggers w villainization as opposed to accepting that plenty of ppl (including trans ppl who aren't attached to the discourse) don't know.

This has already spiraled out into *AMAB NON-BINARY PPL and TRANS WOMEN* insecurely, as if afraid of being attacked, saying "But I believe I had male socialization, is that okay?" As if they did something wrong for daring to separate socialization from identity+expression.

It's beyond the point of absurd. Hierarchies push "scripts" norms onto people, usually in a blanket, and then make adjustments for conflicting scripts (like "men in general" being more assertive, but men of colour's assertiveness is met with more institutional force than white)

Combining my first point with my last tweet, it's not even men in general. It's pushed onto anyone ppl assume are/supposed to become men (assumed to be boys), which, again, maps onto assigned gender at birth. And the scripts are rewarded and punished according to intersection.

Being trans or queer in any way doesn't slow this down. Being cis also doesn't guarantee full internalization of gendered norms (as is the case with gender-nonconforming cis ppl). It's not about cis/trans. It's about rewards and punishments weighted against internal dissonance.

A cis non-conforming person will be punished for deviation, a trans person will be punished and have internal dissonance that may or may not reach their conscious mind during childhood (when primary habits are learned), but rewards aren't cut off.

Often, the rewards are intensified along with punishments when trans or cis ppl deviate from the enforced scripts. A parent might be extra encouraging and heap praise on a GNC or trans kid when they do "act right" even when punishments are in place for going off script.

Peers will also follow suit. When I came out as bi, I was seen as deviant and thus ppl were suddenly extra receptive to me displaying masculinity even while nonconformity became *more* stigmatised. When I came out as n-b, similar compensatory encouragement of manliness arose.

Collapsing discussions of socialization into, basically "[I'm paranoid because I can't tell whether this person is trying to shoehorn TERF rhetoric, therefore] talking about socialization is a dogwhistle or internalized transphobia" is gonna encounter conflict, especially w POC.

Intersectionality has flung open the gates to things like specifically *white* male socialization, and we can't meet that with cynical paranoia when it comes from leftists who haven't proven to be reactionary and are literally just parsing their experience.

The full weight of Anti-TERF protective paranoia and cynicism completely descended upon a Black woman with an ostensibly intersectional analysis because she noted a pattern that *isn't* divorced from how these scripts are pushed (into AMAB ppl mostly, w noted exceptions)

Acting as if it was just some reactionary deliberately trying to misgender people. That's a convenient fiction to simplify and collapse rhetoric into what's comfortable rather than what shines light on experiences. Going into purity mode for expedience is shit practice.

It's also just shit coping. Everytime someone notices binary gender socialization patterns, you can't pretend they don't exist or that cisness or transness inherently create immunity or conformity or vice-versa, in order to temporarily alleviate dissonance.

Being willing to address hierarchies and their affects on people requires you stop solely prioritizing your own individual identities and trying to squash any aspects that remind you of oppression and trauma. That will just lead to more bad faith and paranoia.

Don't take shit from people who mean to organise harm against you, but don't assume a lack of perfect language—especially in an attempted discussion on other hierarchies and intersections of power dynamics—is a green light to treat someone like a blight to be corrected.

Not having flexibility to treat dissonant truth claims& personal narratives from a leftist differently than targeted violence from committed reactionaries—or barely hiding your contempt and desire to control discourse rather than *build* it—is incompatible w coalition-building.

What Ang*e demonstrated (lack of precision & clarity in regards to assigned gender vs. gender socialization) was much less a blight & impediment to building trust + understanding (and numbers!) than a chorus of ppl approaching her as if she had to *prove* she's *not* reactionary.

That paranoid approach needs to be left at the door. Having only one tactic (interrogation and sanitization) will lead you to treat everyone like an enemy without justifiable proof. Triggered trauma, while understandable, is not justification for shitty practical impediments.

It's also heavily individualistic to meet someone's personal processing of gender dynamics with interrogation and demands for submission and revision and apology. It's short-sighted, and tbph it really doesn't even work for advancing numbers. Just building cheap fleeting morale.

So far, these leftists with individualistic tactics have only been able to educate the very small portion of ppl who put up with this kind of decentralised but coordinated interrogation out of guilt and feelings of moral shortcoming, but not everyone tolerates that.

Most people don't tolerate it. It's a shit strategy unless someone has other incentives for looking past your shit tactics of interrogation and "do better!" Thinking any organising can be done this way outside of factionalism is the epitome of arrogance and tactical inadequacy.

Treating people who want to be your comrade, or at least try to be, with interrogation and cynicism, and openly centering your own triggers to leverage compliance, is a failed strategy. You'll mostly attract ppl who simply want moral license to join you in interrogating others.

Once your ability to guilt and pressure people into submitting to, and completing, your inner interrogations, hits a wall, you'll create a distracting shitshow EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you run out of ppl to recruit into your interrogation brigade. And ppl will see you as a mob.

This isn't because your pain isn't valid. It's because we've all internalized hierarchical scripts and we're then trying to build coalition and solidarity in spite of these scripts. The answer isn't "talking about [x] scripts imperfectly requires public interrogation and apology"

That'll never be the answer, unless the question is "How can I normalize public interrogation?" which is a stupid question to ask. It's not justice. Not education. It's carceral and chaotic and it's usefulness is, like I said, limited only to ppl who'll submit to interrogation.

If your only strategy is something that normalizes completely splintered, chaotic group interrogation of one individual who hasn't proven anything other than triggering to you, you're not in it for the longterm. You're in it to *command* change rather than build it.

Once you've run out of people who'll look past your commanding, short-term mentalit in order to empathize (and possibly join your mob) you're gonna find potential teammates that you've completely scared off who want nothing to do with that shitty culture of interrogation.

And it'll absolutely be your fault, even if you're trans. Even if you're not only trans, but non-binary. You'll back yourself into a box of ppl whose primary incentive is shortterm empathy and longterm license to interrogate other leftists. What a pitiful and avoidable error.

You can't beat carceral, chauvinistic logic pervading entire ruling classes of people (and their footsoldiers) by interrogating individual leftists every time they do something hurtful. This is dysfunctional, and it's also the same carceral logic dressed up as "accountability".

More people will turn against it, and then you find that the ranks of people fed up with this shit are filled with just as many trans ppl, or *not* white ppl, or *not* "bootlickers" as your interrogation-obsessed factions, how will you justify your shit tactics any longer?

Shouting "You're a bigot!" at every person who not only refuses to talk about gender the way you think will magically prevent reactionaries from being reactionaries and sanitize the left of all your triggers, but also refuse your interrogations, is a a self-indulgent project.

You can tell yourself it's harm reduction, but what the fuck good does it do to reduce short term emotional harm at the cost of hindering longterm material power? Or is your life so comfortable that your biggest problem is linguistic triggers?

People are gonna see through this shit more and more, and pretending they're all reactionaries—rather than admitting that mass interrogation is shitty no matter how "polite" you are and how "hurt" you make a point of rubbing in your interrogation targets' faces—will isolate you.

And no one will believe you when you claim that you were just addressing harm and seeking apology. Or they'll believe it, and think you're a shit leftist with shit tactics, and they won't endorse your echo chamber of purity policing. It's not worth it. It's never worked.

It's incredibly arrogant to think that *this* might be the era where mass-interrogating every individual who even rhetorically slips up will actually work. The bigger question is do you even care? Or is eliminating all your triggers your only reason for being a leftist?

That's not good enough. Other people have their own triggers, their own worries about rhetoric, and scripts, and norms, and power dynamics. If you think any of this flies in political organising, you're too amateur to take seriously beyond your own individual problems.

And people are sick of dealing with individual problems. Especially leftists who've moved beyond rhetorical struggle and who know working in spite of differences is more important.