It's wonderful having a boyfriend now, one reason being that I no longer have to deal with guys calling me "special needs" or "retarded" on Grindr

Your shock at these messages isn't comforting - it's indicative of your privilege and suggestive of you not engaging with deaf and disabled communities enough. These are things we see and hear everyday. I don't need your pity or sympathy, I just need you to do better.
Mental illness doesn't make a person a bigot. Please be careful with those suggestions.