At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking life would be total shit if you had died
But then I spent so many nights thinking how you got Mao Tse Lung,
And I blamed Hong Kong
And your love of chinese ping pong,
And so you're back
And that is ace

I see your walking with a glad look upon your face,
Peston's changed his stupid look, a moan came from Beth Rigby,
If they'd know for just one second, you'll live for eternity,
Go now, walk out the door, Boultons turning red now,
Burley's frothing on the floor,

Trump's on line one, and when you say goodbye,
Have some crumble
Have a lay down, and a squeeze of nursey's thigh.

Boris Survived, Boris survived.