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on the fujoshi debate, as a queer person this is what i have to say, whether u choose to agree/disagree is fine with me! bc honestly the whole tl is a mess & i dont even know what to believe anymore so i will be leaving the label ‘fujoshi’ out of this.
this is about ATTITUDE, not the label
i think that it is 100% okay to enjoy mlm or wlw work, that’s lovely and great of u to do that, regardless of whether u are part of the lgbt community or not. supporting and liking lgbt has NEVER been the issue
but what is the issue is when u place stereotypes on ACTUAL lgbt couples, when you fetishise them to fulfil your fantasies
ok i’m going to use something that happened to me as an example
so i have a girlfriend and there was once my friend’s friends were arguing about whether sexuality was a choice and i got dragged into it, and when i mentioned that i wanted to stop and leave the argument-
so i have a girlfriend and there was once my friend’s friends were arguing about whether sexuality was a choice and i got dragged into it, and when i mentioned that i wanted to stop and leave the argument-
-because my girlfriend was waiting for me to start our movie date, they immediately started using lgbt stereotypes about tops/bottoms and they wouldn’t stop?? that’s FETISHISING.
placing stereotypes on actual queer couples and assuming that they’re exactly like the ships you-
placing stereotypes on actual queer couples and assuming that they’re exactly like the ships you-
-can find in a manga or a book or a movie, is harmful and reinforces stereotypes that dont exist irl.
for example assuming that someone who bottoms has to be small and short and more gentle etc. you’re essentially placing us into the roles of a character you enjoy for your own entertainment and that can feel very creepy and uncomfortable for us
we aren’t your favourite characters from your fandom just because we happen to be of the same sexuality as them, we’re actual living people and it can be VERY harmful to assume we’re a walking stereotype, i’m going to use another example of something that happened to my friend
CW for mentions of s*xual assault!!
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so i have an irl who is gay and he is a bottom and one of our schoolmates started to harass him sexually, in ways which i will not disclose, and when i finally confronted him and asked him to stop, his explanation was-
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so i have an irl who is gay and he is a bottom and one of our schoolmates started to harass him sexually, in ways which i will not disclose, and when i finally confronted him and asked him to stop, his explanation was-
“-he’s a gay bottom, he enjoys it.”
can you see how harmful that stereotype is? that “bottoms” enjoy whatever is given to them? he took something he found in some fucked up work of fiction, and applied it to an ACTUAL person. he sexually assaulted someone over something-
can you see how harmful that stereotype is? that “bottoms” enjoy whatever is given to them? he took something he found in some fucked up work of fiction, and applied it to an ACTUAL person. he sexually assaulted someone over something-
he found in a WORK OF FICTION. that’s harmful and toxic and it left my friend very badly affected.
i would also like to add that if you enjoy r*pe/n*n-con/d*b-con, that’s a huge no. not just in lgbt works of fiction but even in heterosexual works of fiction. supporting something so horrible is unacceptable regardless of whichever sexuality you’re looking at.
one more example i’ll use, someone asked me and my girlfriend who was the guy or the dyke (yes i am a lesbian, i would NEVER say a slur i am not allowed to reclaim) in the relationship.
this is also harmful and something one might gain from a work of fiction where-
this is also harmful and something one might gain from a work of fiction where-
-one may be more masculine presenting in the wlw or in my case, nblw, relationship while the other may be more feminine presenting.
this doesn’t apply to all lgbt couples and it’s also harmful to believe that al lgbt couples are that way bc it encourages the unhealthy idea that-
this doesn’t apply to all lgbt couples and it’s also harmful to believe that al lgbt couples are that way bc it encourages the unhealthy idea that-
-lgbt couples still have to conform to heteronormativity. it’s like asking which chopstick is the fork and which is the spoon.
im going to end this off with a summary, liking lgbt works of fiction is totally ok!! in fact i 100% support it, but what is not okay is when you take what you read and apply the stereotypes u may find in it to ACTUAL lgbt people because at the end of the day, you have to learn-
-how to separate fiction from reality. they’re two very different things and mixing the two up just doesn’t end well.
well if you’ve read this far thank u!! i really hope this helps
well if you’ve read this far thank u!! i really hope this helps
and for those of u that want to know about my gender and sexuality bc it might affect how u want to view this thread, im a nonbinary lesbian
i have already lost some followers from this thread QHHDJSJSJAJA but u know what that is ok, if u dont agree with me then it’s probably better if u sb or hardblock me bc i can very open with my opinions
