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I haven't spoken to my mom in 3 days because our last conversation was a disaster. She started by complaining that my brother didn't pick up so she had to call me. And she said that I only picked up because I need her in order to have children.
I tried to change the conversation to just ask about her day and she started talking about how great Trump was and how the Governor's want him to look bad. She kept going on and on and then talked about how he'll be POTUS for 4 more years and how wonderful that'll be.
Then she started attacking a family friend for hating Trump and said that family friend was as emotional and ignorant as I was. If we just stopped listening to the MSM we'd understand how great Trump is. And then continued the ad hominem attacks and perpetuating his lies.
Since the conversation was off the rails, I ended up cutting her off and telling her that I'm not interested in this conversation and ended it - as I usually do when she does this. We haven't spoken since. Her MO is to wait for me to call her so she doesn't have to "look weak".
I know during a pandemic is the worst time to get into one of these pissing matches, since we should be cherishing every conversation and the such. But, I just don't feel like calling her back. Maybe I don't want to give her this "victory"? That seems petty and dumb, I know.
But...maybe I don't feel like being the bigger person all the time? I kind of enjoy not dealing with the toxicity that occasionally comes from these conversations? But at the same time, over 30 years of filial piety means that I'm feeling guilty af.
But I didn't start the political part of the conversation, I held my tongued until I had to defend the friend and later myself. She started the whole thing by making snide comments about my fertility. I tried everything in the book to make it a "good" conversation.
I've dissected and gone through the conversation backwards and forwards trying to figure out what I could have done differently and I can't figure it out. I'm just too exhausted to deal with another phone call, but at the same time I'm worried about not checking in.
I don't know what the point of this thread was. I just needed to get it off my chest. Both the venting and the guilt. It's frustrating and stressful dealing with her nonsense. My therapist says I need to figure out a better way to cope with my mom because she'll never change.
I have no clue what those ways would be though. Those adaptive thinking skills worksheets only go so far when dealing with these conversations.
