I use marijuana to help me with my pain from my muscle disorder and for my depression and anxiety. I haven’t been able to smoke in two days and I honest to god feel so sick and horrible. Yesterday was my grandmas birthday, the one who called me a horrible person and a liar on my

FB of all things, so I had to think about that all day. Today, turns out, is siblings day. I have an INCREDIBLY complicated relationship with all of my siblings, one which reminds me of my childhood trauma in the worst ways. It just feels like one knife to the gut after another.

at least Easter is quickly approaching, another traumatic holiday for me. When I was ab 5 or 6, before things got *really* with my step mother, I came upstairs (when i was actually still allowed to) and it was April 16th, my birthday and Easter that year. I asked meekly where

(*got really bad w my stepmother*) where the easter bunny had left my basket. With my two younger siblings tearing into their baskets behind her, my step mom barely glanced at me and was like “oh since it’s your birthday I didn’t think you’d need a basket” my birthday was not

celebrated otherwise that day and that’s the day as a little girl I realized the easter bunny wasn’t real. I was the first out of all my friends.

I’m really sorry for the length of this thread. April is just a hard time for me