1/8 I found some old emails I had sent to my parents when I came out as trans at 14. They focus a lot on how I had always worn boy clothes, and how I hated my hips and wanted to lose weight. They also included "research" done by me where I referenced stories I had found online of
2/ other "trans children" and how that those stories were justifications for why I shouldn& #39;t be told I was too young to make the decision. I was already so focused on surgery as well, asking if we could save up money for it. I don& #39;t remember myself very well from back then, but I
3/ do know I sent this only a few weeks after I had found videos from a popular FTM youtuber. I did briefly want to "become a boy" at the age of 9 as well, but that was dismissed at the time and then I was just.. okay, until the age of 14. Of course I added that memory to my list
4/ of things that validated my desire to transition. It& #39;s weird to read back on my words. I sent those emails at a time where I was severely depressed. I never left my room, I didn& #39;t go to school, I suffered from a phobia of going outside. And I stayed that way for a long time.
5/ I didn& #39;t even manage to get back into school to finish it until I was 17. And I still struggle to do things now.

And it makes me wonder what my doctors were seeing. They knew what I struggled with, they had seen my emails. They even had it written down themselves and they
6/ would refer to it many times that I was obsessing over it too much, like it was a special interest (Autism) for me. I do now believe that there was an incredibly obsessive aspect to it. My life revolved around it. I stopped living any life I had just to focus on transition.
7/ And I will never understand why they allowed a child who was severely distressed, behind socially and had barely even lived a life, and who also clearly had an obsessive focus on one thing as a "fix all" - to transition.

I wanted it. But it shouldn& #39;t have been allowed.
8/8 I feel like my unhealthy thoughts and obsessions were just enabled. But at 14-16, how could I realize that? I thought it was right for me for so long.

There should be better safeguards, I don& #39;t think that a child could ever be truly "informed" enough to make such a decision.
You can follow @MediocreDruid.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: