Ok lets do this https://twitter.com/MarkOStack/status/1119983287399849984

Awww unlike the app I used to use google play doesn’t allow screen grabs. :-( you’ll have to take my word for it this is the title card of the theatrical cut

I know it’s all orchestrated by Lex in some way but Lois and Clark starting a war so she can wander in and ask insightful questions like ‘General, are you a terrorist’ while not knowing her cameraman is CIA is dopey as heck.

Why does Metropolis look as grim as the New York of Se7en?

Paddington 2 is on TV and instead I’m watching BVS on my phone so never let it be said I don’t commit to a bit.

Batman branding criminals is very close to Zorro scarring his enemies with the Z slash... but the film the Waynes were watching wasn’t a Zorro film as it often is, but Excalibur. That feels like a missed connection.

Haven’t got dressed yet today so I’m still wearing the t-shirt from my BVS pajamas. Collar is now somewhat wrecked due to being four years old and from primark. Not sure what excuse my jawline has for being similarly loose.

Got distracted from BVS but having watched Superman III this week can you imagine the Richard Lester version of BVS? The number of slapstick gags he could cram into that destruction of Metropolis scene.

OK I’ve been back watching Batman v Superman and this remains a very frustrating film. Every time you get some combination of Batman,Superman, Wonder Woman and Lex together the film springs to life but the first scene with them all doing stuff is the party 40 minutes in.

40 DAMN MINUTES. And the rest is some ok bat manning and a lot of half baked noodling about the use of power, cheap religious symbolism, white saviour bullshit and endless dream sequences, visions and other unreal nonsense.

You can tell Snyder is a still photographer because he’s got a fantastic eye for the single image but they don’t necessarily hang together. Narratively it’s fine, he’s not Michael Bay, but there are baffling moments where a scene deflates because of cutting to a longshot.

Anyway most importantly - do batfleck’s chiselled CGI abs in the training montage mean that he, like Lego Batman, has a seven pack?

The Batman/Superman fight is ok, Batman rescuing Martha and Arkham Asyluming his way through a tonne of goons is great and the three heroes teaming up at last to fight Doomsday is really great. Oh this is why I always end up on a high with this movie isn’t it?

The ‘DC trinity’ thing is reductive but these three work so well together it’s insane that Superman is dead by the end so we don’t get all three interacting through most of Justice League.

Anyway I’ve finished it now and I like it less than in the cinema and watching the Ultimate Cut on blu ray the day it came out but there’s still bits I loved and aaaaargh it’s very annoying that they never got to the full potential of Batfleck.

Hopefully we’ll see Cavill and co come back for a film where he gets to do some actual proper Superman stuff? Anyway, tomorrow is Suicide Squad and even the theatrical cut is 2 hours long. :-(

Lo as I enter the valley of unsubtle music drops I shall not Fear The Reaper:

pet hate - heightened bad assness built from taking bullshit toxic masculinity incredibly seriously and at face value. Suicide Squad is a film by someone who has never seen a feeble excuse for terrible behaviour that they didn’t nod along to, thinking it was incredibly deep.

10 minutes in and I’m already deeply irritated by the one note toxicity of all the characters and the ridiculous layers of exposition and flashback and captions as the movie tries to search for an opening act.

I am not usually that idiot watching a spin off and dopily moaning that I’m not watching the parent franchise instead but goddamit in this case the glimpses of Batman and the Flash we get here suggest far more interesting stories with more appealing characters than this one.

Actual good thing about Suicide Squad - the occasionally eye popping colour scheme of vivid greens and purples. Not surprised that vibrancy is one of the few things to carry over to BoP.

Right long break for lunch and family time, back to this nonsense later

Ok I’m back on suicide squad. That they’re still introducing characters 45 minutes into a two hour movie is Not Good. The chronology of the Midway City mission is completely nonsensical if you know the ‘twist’.

Waller killing off her staff is one of those ‘badass’ things that makes no sense and leaves a bad taste. If they weren’t ‘cleared’ why were they even there? Is what’s happening in this massive city supposed to be secret? Has Waller never heard of an NDA?

There’s a severe problem with stakes caused by everything in the plot being related to the squad - the baddy is a member of the team, they’re rescuing their boss. It’s all very insular, and inverts morality so the killers are the only real people and civilians disposable.

Midway City is the home of Hawkman, Hawkgirl and the Doom Patrol. If the suicide squad have been rescuing Hawkman or the Chief now that would have been a twist.

As a movie, Suicide Squad is definitely a collection of scenes. I wouldn’t even say a series of scenes, as that would imply a conscious order whereby one thing leads to another

It’s stopped now. Tomorrow: Justice League.

Just to set the tone for my tweeting of Justice League straight up can we talk about how the Superman and Batman pre title scenes are some of the best with those characters ever shown in films? Cavill’s best superman moment so far, even with CG top lip, talking to those kids.

And while I like the Burton and Nolan Batman films a lot they’re not exactly great at hand to hand action. Batfleck jumps straight off the page here in that rooftop scene. Bit of a cheat that he somehow gets dragged around the city and ends up on the same roof, but great stuff.

In the grand tradition of superhero films shooting US scenes in the UK, the title sequence of Justice League features American cops arresting someone on a street with visible sky dishes on the walls.

The Old Bailey scene feels like Whedon but is AFAIK 100% Snyder - I think the directorial excesses are cramped a bit by shooting on location. WW remains rad as hell and her theme kicking in always works.

Comparing the flattish scene of Arthur diving into the sea after talking to Bruce with the later, far more bombastic scene where he smashes the bottle amongst crashing waves it’s pretty glaring which is reshoot and which is OG Snyder.

The Whedon reshoots - as much as we can spot them - feel about 50% functional scenes to create a streamlined plot with clearer, warmer character arcs, and 50% absolute DC fanboy magic. There’s as much tension between those as with the Snyder material.

There’s not just two but maybe three potentially enjoyable movies here that don’t quite add up to one coherent two hour movie, but I love those individual highlights from both directors.

BTW I don’t use one of those vanity apps that tracks follows and unfollows so if this thread makes you unfollow me you need to tell me on the way out.