(AP) Trump donor and Mar-A-Lago member Ron Meatballsub, inventor of the Flaming Jaegermeister Enema Shot™, to be named Economic Recovery Czar. Mr. Meatballsub, currently incarcerated on 11 counts of Manslaughter by Watercraft (Jet ski) will be pardoned by The President in /1

order to attend his own swearing in ceremony with his 27th wife Bananas Versaciii3. The President called Mr. Meatballsub "One of the greats, everybody is saying he's the last word in windshield wipers," apparently mistakenly referring to the Rain-X Weatherbeater brand of 2/

wiper. Mr. Meatballsub's immediate plan to stimulate economic growth is to drill a $77 trillion tunnel to the center of the Earth "to capture Bigfoots (sic) or angels". Democrats called the plan "ill-advised".