I have something to say. So, i was joined a tele GC formed to help migrant workers during this time. I was just minding my business and being silent, wanting to respond only when I could offer my services to the group ah.

So someone sent an informal response of an agency to the group. They said that if inadequate aid was given, there will be conflict arising between those who recieved the aid and those who didnt. E.g. we can only give 2000 masks to 4000 migrant worker.

Someone in the group quoted that and started agreeing to it. They were like, " its a real concern, worse case scenario, what if got riot?" The way they were discussing, it was like maybe we shouldnt give them aid, if not could make things worse and i was like???

First off, if there was a riot, its because WE put 20000 of them in a small space with no proper measures. So really, its on us. Secondly, these people want to deny them aid, Aid they desperately need cos they believe the migrant workers will riot over the aid we give????

Its like if i need 20 dollars and my friend could only give me 10, I am somehow gonna lose it/ be worst off if I took the 10 dollars, compared to not taking the money at all. It makes no sense right? Logically, i would take whatever money i can, N either make do or find some more

Idk why they came to that reasoning, but to me it felt racist. It felt like they were subscribing to this racist
ideology that migrant workers are violent and aggressive human beings. And that idealogy is being weponised to give them less aid.

And when I tried to explain to them , they just doubled down and pull out the "little india riot" rheotoric to justify their racist ass take. It was not only sickening to read their messages but also to watch other people chime in, " yea all of you made good points" to this.

Even the moderators didnt step in to stop their ignorant remarks. She just chimed in when someone tried to change topic. Its clear she wanted to move on from the convo rather than address the issue at hand. Am I dissapointed? Yes. Surprised? No

This is why, I personally dislike chinese activists. Its like many of you refuse to make your spaces safe for brown people and have no wish to unlearn your internalised racism, which then affects me. I just came to the group to help migrant workers eh, not be an activist.

Why am I subjected to the racist notions of chinese liberals. Can you all give me a break? Its like, no matter how hard you try, you just cannot stop being racist. Its so frustrating. And when brown people call you out, you just continue to gaslight and marginalise us.

And god forbid, if we ever get too angry about it. You cause us so much pain, refuse to let us express in a productive way and when we finally snap, we are punished for it. No wonder i have such anger against you all lol. This is why I am in therapy btw.

I am emotionally ok. I have found ways to cope . Cos like I said, its not a surprise to me. But I am so so so tired of this. Chinese people, tell me this. Will I ever be able to enter a chinese dominated space and feel safe? Is every brwn person always gonna b this unconfortable?

I am telling this so that my chinese allies and mutuals understand. This is what its like for brown people in activism. Constantly frustrated and constantly having to deal with this. If you want to help, make this toxic spaces safe, so brown people can thrive.