Thread by @KittenzCaboodle, The sad thing happened. TW death. I've mentioned our little old lady [...]

The sad thing happened.
TW death.

I've mentioned our little old lady Lucy on here a time or two. She was almost 14. We had to put her down today.

A few weeks ago she had a massive seizure. I was holding her at the time, trying to keep her frim choking on her own vomit.

Her heart stopped. My hand was on her chest and I felt it. My mom was there and said her eyes were dead.

Her heart started again a few seconds later.

We took her to the vet, where she slowly came back to her senses. By the time the vet saw her, it looked loke nothing had happened.

We've spent the last few weeks taking care of her and making sure she was comfortable. She's slowly been deteriorating, but she was still moving, drinking, responding, and eating some foods.

We hoped she would pass in her sleep. She was always a bed dog. She loved being under blankets with people.

She was such a cuddlebug.

She had another seziure today. We had decided if she did, if she didn't pass overnight, she would have to be put down.

She hadn't recovered fully from this one. The vet let my sister hold her (she had been Lucy's main caretaker. She and Lucy had always had a special bond.)

We're burying her tonight.

And as devestated as I am, I'm almost relieved.

It was for the best.

She fought back once. My mom and I think she didn't want to leave us so suddenly.

She gave us a chance to say our goodbyes and I will always be thankful for the extra time she gave us.

It's been a rough few weeks watching our baby slowly fade, but at least we could say goodbye

She's been around for over half of my life. It's going to be weird and awful for a while, not having her around, but we still have our other two dogs.

Lucy was always in Fred's life. They slept together, and got along great. I hope he's going to be okay once he realizes.

I'm crying while I write this, it hurts so much to lose our baby, but she gave me time to make peace with it. I owe her so much for that.

I'm sorry. I know this isnt the happiest news, and its borderline nothing compared to what other people are going thru in the world, but she was a huge part of my world and it hurts so much right now.

Part of the reason I startes wriitng CAL instead of SnG is because I needed to write something light and fun and hopeful during this. I'n going to see CAL thru before I get back to SnG.

Writing is theraputic for me. Even starting SnG was daunting because it came off a year-long writing hiatus because of things.

Normally writing is the first thing I give up on when I'm going through things. I don't know why that is.

Not this time tho. I'm staying at it for my sake. Writing is a relief and a break from life. I need that right now. We all do.

Might not be as fast, but I'm keeping at it this time. I dont want to lose it again. I still have so many stories I want to tell.

This thread is a mess. Sorry. Im rambling. I'm going to miss Lucy so much, but I'm thankful for the time she gave us. I'm thankful she picked us at the adoption center. I'm thankful for how much we got to love her and how much she loved us.

You have no idea how she meant to us.

We've been thru a lot together. She -and thr other 2- survived a natural disaster that nearly killed all of us a few years back. One I'm still affected by mentally.

We made sure to find houses that were dog-friendly to stay in. Nothing else mattered, just let us keep the dogs.

And I could keep talking forever about how sweet she was, about how smart, how stubborn, about how she was a little stinker, about how she learned new tricks in a day, but I need to stop (and probably delete this all later) For both you and me.

Let me just finish with

Lucy, you were such a good girl, such a pretty girl, and we will love you always and forever.

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