My heart is dead. Having a mother who bullies me is no fucking joke. I can’t explain the 5:30am texts to start off my day like shit. The texts through out the day, throwing off my entire mood. Whenever I see mom, it’s a text that pushes my most vulnerable buttons & I’m drained.

Imagine everyday you build a sandcastle of happiness of self worth, and then your mom comes out of no where and destroys it.. then again the next day, then sometimes the next week. It’s a constant battle.

Sometimes it’s in the form of just random yelling and questioning my relationship with my dad, sometimes it’s telling a family member something about me that isn’t true, and then sending them to fight with me.. I think this is callled naracassistic abuse. I don’t even know.

It’s been like this my whole life and I’m drained.

On social media and in real life you would never even know my mom does this to me. She acts like the sweetest person ever. She’ll even act like I’m the demanding person. At family functions.

If someone asks me if I want a food item, she’ll interrupt with “oh she doesn’t eat it like that. Right sweetie? I always used to make it a certain way. It’s a lot but I do anything or my babies.” I’m just like..