My 1st apartment alone in LA was a 400 sqft studio right on the corner of Beverly & Fairfax. I worked directly across the street at A Band Apart Productions which was famous because it was co-owned by Tarantino & Laurence Bender (1x)

I started there as an intern & my main responsibility was running downstairs each day to Swingers to pick up lunch for everyone in the office. By the time I stopped working there several yrs later I was a line producer & still eating 2-4x a day at the diner down the street. (2x)

When clubs like Star Shoes and Joseph's were huge, we would stay out all night and then head to Swingers for stuffed grilled cheese and fries w/extra ranch at 3 in the morning. After Sept 11th I gathered there with friends for breakfast because we couldn't stand to be alone. (3x)

By then I'd moved to a one bedroom in Silverlake but still regularly made the trek back west for quinoa bowls, and turkey burgers. (4x)

Before I knew it, decades had passed & I was married & had 2 kids & inexplicably moved back to where I'd come from, the dreaded West LA. Now I drove east w/2 kids in the back so THEY could have milkshakes & patty melts at the place w/hearts & cows that they loved so much. (4x)

I have had innumerable important conversations, life changing revelations, and also just meaningless joyful times hanging out at Swingers. I'm really going to miss it. A stupid restaurant. A trivial thing. But I had to write it where someone else could see. (?x)

Because so much is being taken from us- so many things disappearing, so much death.. and I can't help but feel if I don't put words to the memories in my heart that they will die too and all of that emptiness absolutely terrifies me.