trigger warning!! this thread will include mentions of suicide, self harm and depression!! so if those topics make you uncomfy, i understand don’t worry!!

as majority of you may know, i really struggle with poor mental health, it’s been a huge issue of mine for roughly 4 years and there is little in my life that makes me happy again.

one of the things that makes me happy is sm*sh, and to be more specific shayne. i honestly can’t put into words how happy shayne makes me, he brings me laughter in my darkest moments and gives me hope that things will get better.

tw // depression, suicide!!
what i don’t think anyone knows is that i tried to c*mmit s*ic*de last year, at one of my darkest points mentally. my depression (which was undiagnosed at the time) had become so bad that i thought this was the only way out of this pain

tw // self harm!!
yet i still to this day struggle with s*lf h*rm, but even on my darkest days there are people who bring me so much happiness, which shayne and sm*sh does every day.

i know now that this isn’t the answer, listening to some of the podcasts shayne (and other members) have helped me realise that i should never do that if i ever get that way again.

now, i just want to make it clear that i in no way condone what has been done and said, i am disgusted about this whole situation and i am so sorry to everyone who is offended by this insensitivity and to my friends who have left the fandom i support you 100%!

but i’m writing this thread to express how hard it is for me (and most likely others) to suddenly drop shayne and sm*sh after this situation and after everything that they’ve done for me.

i will personally ONLY stan shayne, olivia, noah, courtney and keith!

so, if there comes a day where i feel strong enough to leave i might, but i hope and pray that there isn’t and i hope that sm*sh addresses and apologises for this situation. i love you all so much and i support you all so much, do whatever you feel comfortable with <33