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"am i gay if i am into boys but only if they look like or intentionally dress up as girls?" well ill let you work that one out for yrself
i cannot tell you who is or isnt gay or is or isnt trans but i can tell you i thought i was straight but still asked my (beard) boyfriend if i could call him my girlfriend "just cuz". youll get there
before i understood i was both trans and i gay i thought i was into gay men (???) and knew that it was wrong and fetishy for cis women to be obsessed with gay men. surprise! i was attracted to *gayness* and *gender nonconformity*
being interested in and attracted to men is something that is educationally forced upon, taught to, and learned by pretty much everyone in a society that favors men in general. sometimes ur brain does mental gymnastics to be gaystraight for society. its weird!
i also went through a phase as a baby trans of trying to be a gay for men trans masc bc i was terrified of "what if im a lesbian" bc i thought if i was a lesbian it would mean a lifetime of abuse was "justified" bc ppl had been "right" abt me but thats a different story
