Another thing: the concept of "settling." I kind of think that this idea that unless I'm the best at something, I'm "settling," has been part of the reason I've drifted from subject to subject, from career path to career path.

I'm only 27, but I've done: English BA, sexual assault advocacy, refugee resettlement support, English tutoring, freelance executive writing, Global Interactions MA, part of a Biology BA, and part of an English MA.

(This is not to act like I'm some Renaissance Clam and therefore better than anyone else. It's just to show that I've jumped around a LOT in a very short time.)

I've been down on myself a lot for two things: the fact that I haven't created a coherent career, and the fact that I've never been "the best" at anything. And a lot of this, I think, has to do with what I REALLY, REALLY want to do have always felt like "settling."

See, for most of my life, I have really wanted to work with animals - farm animals and domestic animals specifically. I come from a long line of farmers and people of the land, and so this has always felt very natural to me. Homesteading, farming - my DREAM.

But the "American dream," G&T pressure, academia, has all told me that I need to move *away* from my roots, to move into higher and higher echelons of society - to "make it" off the land and into the city.

And I hate that. I hate that what I really want to do feels so out of reach for so many reasons: disenfranchisement, debt, lack of skills. In reaching for what society wanted me to do, I have moved away from what I really wanted to do, what my heart has yearned for.

And I've kind of screwed myself out of *ever* reaching that dream, because in going for all these administrative, business, imaginary job skills, I haven't learned the basic things I would need to be successful working with animals and the land.

This is all to say that your dreams are NEVER settling. Don't do what I have, don't listen to what everyone tells you. If you have a wish deep in your bones, make it happen.