Run BTS! Episode 99: Bangtan Flirts with a Florist

We begin with witticism.

HERE’S THE THING: they used the American spelling “flutist” for the subs, but the British spelling/pronunciation is “flautist”, so if you know that one, I can see where you would get flautist and florist mixed up.

Kim Namjoon:

This feels like the right time to remind everyone that Joon likes plants more than people and pets.

They’re like this the entire episode.

They are introduced to their florist instructor, and because he is young and handsome, the entirety of Bangtan is like WHAT DO WE DO?????? And then immediately start hitting on him.

THIS IS A LIFETIME MOVIE I WOULD WATCH EVERY TIME IT WAS AIRED.

Joon and Kook know their birth flowers already, and Joon is like HELLO, MINE IS CLEMATIS, IT’S OVER THERE, I CAN ID IT, IT’S MINE, BE IMPRESSED while Kook is all, “Soon, I will have a tattoo of a tiger lily.”

He’s so keen, my heart.

I...............................………indeed.

Okay! Birthday flower identification time!

Yoongi’s is actually a tree! And Seokjin’s sounds like the word for swimmer!

You can find your birth flower here!

http://www.flower-korea.com/html/birth_flower.htm

That....is not Jimin’s birthday.

OH MY GOD X 2.

Staff: What floral thing would you like to make?

Taehyung: A living art installation for the living room.

Joon: Please give us the easiest possible assignment.

Florist: We’re making boutonnieres.

And then Bangtan gets all moony over The Florist.

Behold Namjoon, revealing the age of The Florist via fractions.

Taehyung decides it’s a nice time for a bittersweet story, and Sope are like ???????? THE HELL ARE YOU ON ABOUT???? until The Florist is done with his boutonniere, and then story time is abruptly over.

After gazing in awe at The Florist’s boutonniere, Bangtan need to pick out their own flowers. So Seokjin is like “I will use this hydrangea, it looks like a Medieval weapon, I’m into that.”

Jin: LOOK AT THIS NON-PLANT.

Joon: A BOUTONNIERE IS MADE OF PLANTS.

The Florist: The non-plant is décor.

Jin. …damnit.

Seokjin decides that since he can’t use the hydrangea or the peacock feather, he will use tiger lily...pods? buds?...for the added flair he’s looking for and Kook is like DUDE, THOSE LOOK LIKE CHILIS.

IMAGINE IMPRESSING @BTS_twt WITH YOUR SNAPPY COMEBACK, THIS IS LITERALLY EVERYTHING I WANT IN LIFE.

Oh my God.

This is a dating show.

1. I have yet to properly acknowledge Tae’s glasses, WHICH ARE GLORIOUS.

2. Foreshadowing.

3. LMAO

Has......Hobi ever been self-conscious before? Is this the first time he has worried about his style?????

Seokjin is the living embodiment of “And what about it?”

Tae’s boutonniere

Look at all their boutonnieres!

Joon = The Plant Master

I had to pause at “BTS members are weird” because I was laughing so hard.

Case in point.

OKAY, moving right along, time to graduate from boutonnieres to ARRANGEMENTS. They choose what sort of arrangements they’ll make, and it turns out they don’t know what a wreath is and The Florist, in his wisdom, compares it to a donut.

Jimin’s arrangement is in a glass bowl, and The Florist gave him tweezers to use, but Jimin is all “NO NEED, I GOT SMALL HANDS.”

Please, Joon will 100% open an art gallery / floral studio in, like, five years.

Please appreciate Kim Seokjin’s artistic vision.

The Florist is a suave diplomat, y’all.

And now, this week’s installment of Eternal Roommates: The Best Bickering. @BTS_twt

HOW ARE THEY SO GOOD AT THIS???????

Also, omg Yoongs.

They absolutely watched floral tutorials on Youtube before going to film this, I refuse to believe they are just naturally good at basically eveything.

PEOPLE WOULD PAY SO MUCH MONEY FOR THAT, THIS IS ABSURD.

Someone will recreate this for Coachella.

The Florist is very warm and complimentary to all of them, but in the end.......Seokjin wins.

And Yoongi is like “WAIT, THIS FLORIST CANNOT TAKE SEOKJIN AWAY, WE ARE ETERNAL ROOMMATES, WE GO FISHING TOGETHER, I WILL WEAR THIS AVANT-GARDE FLOWER CROWN TO REMIND SEOKJIN OF OUR FRIENDSHIP.”

Until next time!