addressing something that's been bothering me for a long time RIGHT now. read if you feel like it

i've had many of my friends unfollowing me because of things i've said in the past. i will be admitting to all of it on this thread, explaining myself and apologizing because i really am sorry and really. don't want to lose any of my good friends.

so i am going to be owning up to it all now, and this part is very selfish and i'm aware, but it really is not good for my mental health and i can not keep going on like this.

so, first thing, there was a discussion about pansexuality. i said something stupid, something along the lines of "pansexuality and bisexuality are basically the same thing, because they overlap so widely" i don't agree with this statement, and i made my standpoint-

on the issue VERY clear afterwards. the tweets have been deleted now and i have apologized personally to anyone i've known that was hurt by this incident. i will also add, that i DID list pansexuality's history, who coined it and how it was originally defined,

and i genuinely understand if it makes someone uncomfortable to hear it, and i am deeply sorry, but i never meant to imply that's what pansexuality entails NOW. it was stupid of me to do but trying to educate myself obviously includes me trying my best to understand it.

this attempt at understanding it all better inevitably led me to HISTORY. i didn't coin the label pansexual. i didn't come up with it. i am so sorry if me listing the history made you uncomfortable and because some people do not like to talk about it, i won't be

saying it here either, because i respect you. genuinely. if someone's that interested you can do a google search on pansexual history. so, in conclusion, on this: people think that i am panphobic because i was very uneducated and ignorant as fuck. i did explain myself shortly

after, and like i said, made my stance clear. even if i don't think this way and even if it wasn't ever my intention to invalidate someone, or for it to come across like that, i know it did. and i know it offended people and made certain people feel really bad.

my ACTUAL stance on this:
i think pan and bi ARE seperate things, i don't think pansexuality isn't valid. i still think the labels overlap, because they do, but i'm aware there's a distinction. like i said my tweets are deleted, but here's this from that day to give perspective

and i'm genuinely sorry for anyone who was hurt by what i said. i've educated myself since then and tried my best to not fuck up again, but knowing me, i really don't think before i say shit, and this brings us to the next thing i'm just going to address:

demisexuality!! this was something a little less about ignorance and more about stupidity and being way too unclear at attempting to explain my views on something and failing at it. was still VERY stupid of me. for reference, i will be, once again, saying exactly

where i fucked up and what went wrong. a few days ago, i said (under a discussion abt pan and demisexuality, first mistake going back to it) that ''demisexuality doesn't really describe someone's sexuality which is about which genders you're attracted to" and a few more things.

i am more than aware of how shitty this is and once again, tried explaining myself and how i really need to think what shit might sound like to other people if i don't say it well enough first. this is a lesson seriously learned and i will be more considerate in the future.

so. i'd like to apologize to everyone who was hurt by this comment as well. i didn't mean to invalidate anyone and as you can see here i explained my thoughts afterwards. once again i am aware this is shitty, and i'm aware what i said was wrong,

but i never ever meant to invalidate ANYONE that's demisexual. all i was trying to say is that demisexuality does not describe sexuality in the traditional way. this person also told me that sexuality isn't strictly about gender. which i didn't know until then

because i thought romantic attraction is about how you are attracted to people and sexuality is about which genders. so it all came down to being ignorant and stupid about something once again.

my actual views on this: demisexuality is valid. it describes sexuality differently than usual. "lesbian", "gay" and even "pan" for example, tell you the gender someone's attracted to. only one, every, etc. this is what caused confusion and led me to believe that

demisexuality was mislabeled, or something, because it wasn't specifically about gender. and it's not my place to try and tell anyone what they should be identifying as but im a very argumentative and impulsive person and don't think things through well enough before acting.

im not trying to say i didn't say or do anything wrong because yeah, i did, but i am also allowed to explain myself because i don't want people thinking that i am a bad person and enjoy invalidating people. like i said yesterday i do not care what people

identify as and don't intend to police them unless it's directly harmful to ME and my identity. these two times i fucked up majorly and all i can do here is APOLOGIZE.

i apologize to anyone that might have been hurt by what i've said, i apologize to everyone i offended and especially i apologize to my friends. i am so so sorry for ever making anyone feel invalidated

because of my ignorance and stupidity. somethings that's completely and entirely on me. it's up to you to decide if you want to forgive me, not up to me to try and force you into it. take this thread into consideration before spreading lies about me to other people

and painting me as someone i am not. i hope this ends this cycle of a certain group of people telling everyone to not talk to me, spreading unsolicited shit in secret and not letting me stand up for myself. i am MORE than aware that what i said was hurtful. i am MORE

than aware that i should have NOT said any of these things before educating myself properly. all i am asking is for forgiveness from these people and everyone that was left feeling invalidated or shitty. i am GENUINELY sorry. logging of for a while now.