Over the last week or so I have gotten about two dozen voicemails from my mom. Each of them pretty much says the same thing: where is dad, why isn't he home, and she is reporting him as a missing person.

She and dad have both been in touch with the sheriff. The sheriff's office knows dad's whereabouts, they know he is safe. They'veve done wellness checks on mom and determined she is also safe. Which throws a wrench in our hopes of getting her help, but I'll address that later.

Today I got a new voicemail. She:

-can't get my dad to take her to the store
-car won't start, and she refuses to drive anyway (thank god for that)
-can't get dog food delivered right now ("a taxi to the dog food place would cost $100)

"On your way home from work, couldn't you just stop by the house and give me a ride to the store so I can shop?"

I just ... look, I know this is partly what we want. We need her to hit rock bottom. There's no other way that I can see.

But fuck.

BUT ALSO.

a) she is still having the cleaners come ... once a week? Twice a month? They were there last week apparently - and b) mom GOT ONE OF THEM TO DRIVE HER TO THE FUCKING GROCERY STORE SO SHE COULD BUY WINE.

That is not social distancing. That is not being safe. That is not mom being aware of ANYTHING going on right now.

I am all mixed up right now but I know this:

I cannot go to my mother's house. I cannot bring her food. I cannot bring her dog food. I cannot take her to the store. To do so would not only enable her alcoholism but it would put both of us at an unnecessary risk of exposing each other to this virus.

She was in the fucking ER two weeks ago. She spent the night in the hospital. And I absolutely know that, along with her pity-party bullying to get a ride to the store, she likely did not follow social distancing instructions or wear protection of any kind.

Fuck I am mad and sad. I don't have a real purpose behind this thread other than to rage-tweet my feelings just so they are out there. No need to feel like you need to advise. I am not going to help her out on this one.

Thanks for listening. <3