I was at my peak when I wasn’t worried about men and their feelings. Which doesn’t mean being mean, I was kind. But I really was just enjoying life and learning stuff from them. That’s the vibe, just dating to learn and have fun. When those things stop, what’s the point?

Like one thing I realized about myself is I care more about things being healthy and fun. If you’re picky about who you date, you’ll always find people who invest in you. But the minute I get moved by someone’s feelings I end up committing to be nice/nurture (wow cancer moon).

then my Sagittarius sun bright sides the darkest things because wElL i Am CuRiOuS & wAnNa UnDeRsTaNd. That’s what I gotta let go of. I have to stop moving to appease others. I am in the process of teaching myself how to prioritize myself. Which requires unpacking a lot of-

Tw: Rape

Reflecting on trauma today has really helped me realize how rape made be unconsciously operate from a place of fear. I didn’t trust myself. I resented myself for what I couldn’t control. I thought it was my fault I couldn’t make life “ok” for all of my life.

The trauma that came after rape just reinforced the lonely, scared, and neglected perspectives. I think this society does a lot to make women/queer folks, Black people, young people, that we don’t know ANY better. That “children” should be seen and not heard.

I feel like a lot of Scorpio and Scorpio generation know the feeling/narrative. It’s infantilizing a generation of people, reinforced by a system of trauma (media, rape culture, etc).

After being raped I became very obsessed with “why”. Which included studying rape as a weapon.

We see this in the Congo, Rwanda, and the United States of America. We would be f**king idiots to not QUESTION how rape culture is used as a weapon in a country where our president has be repeatedly accused of sexual assault.

E.G. American History, read the whole page.

This is such a rabbit hole, but I’ve really begun unpacking a lot of trauma. For me, it’s rarely just one trauma. It’s diverse, complex, and nuanced. They feed into each other and reinforce each other.

The more time we have to unpack our trauma the more time we have to think.

I’ve been thinking about what a culture of healing would look like. Then I realized it can not exist in this culture. Not with this government. Not with this system of trauma, reinforcing and creating trauma for us. I do wonder if this country uses rape culture in America to-

I hope we find a way to create a culture of healing, but it starts with A GOVERNMENT/LEADERS allowing for the dismantling of systems that perpetuate/create trauma. Imagine how much our minds would free up, if we had a government that wanted us to heal and then evolve.