confession: i got mad and kinda felt that the people around me are bad influence(s).

then i realized that they're making me happy, PLUS we've gone through so much things, AND we did our best to show honesty and transparency towards each other--

++ i felt like they're a big part of every bullshit i'm in. i've been so furious of myself for i let myself get lower. and i'm also mad at the fact that my friends, admit it or not, are one of the reasons why i'm being like 'this'

(lols akin na lang yung this)

++ i thought of drifting away from them, for i have thought that they're ruining me.

but i realized that 'me' is mine. i have my own choice.

++ it is my fault. only mine.

they freed me from the invisible bars that made me a prisoner of buried pain.

i was able to vent out. they let me. they listened. but i was the one who abused my right.

that made me 'worse'.

++ i face-shamed, slut-shamed, backstabbed, and did badmouth the people that made me feel bad. the certain people that caused me pain and worries.

it is my fault. i should have not done that.

++ i won't be taking all the blame. they're not saints tho lol– which made me think of putting the blame on them huhu sorry.

well anyway, we've thrown rants at each other talking about the people that piss the fuck off of us.

++ our tongues are sharp and we, sometimes, exaggerate things. welp maybe it is sometimes just for the sake of having fun.

but i just want to say that me and my friends may not be the perfect and ideal group of people.

we make mistakes, of course. everyone commits mistakes. everyone's a sinner LOL.

++ BEFORE I end this thread, I want to apologize to my friends for I have thought bad of you. SORRY PO HUHU.