I've been stuck indoors, like most other people, for the past few weeks

Like a lot of people, I've barely worn makeup in this time (i don't wear it daily anyway, but that's beside the point rn)

The times I have are when I'm going to be seen

It (and a tweet by @SofieHagen) has gotten me thinking about why I wear makeup, or nice clothes, or whatever

And it's not for me...not exactly

It's not that I wear it for male approval (honestly the less non-queer men pay attention to my existence, the better)

But it isn't purely for my own enjoyment/gratification

I dress the way I do because my style is language and communication

Putting on a suit or a denim jacket or my gold evening dress are all me trying to express who I am to the people I meet

It's me explaining myself and my priorities without really explaining them

When I'm at home alone, I know who I am. I don't need to show anyone who I am, so red lipstick and hoop earrings are about as useful as talking to myself

(I do talk to myself sometimes, and I wear makeup home alone sometimes. They're fairly analogous)

I'm not sure if I'm making sense, or even if this matters

But if you, like me, haven't plucked your eyebrows or done your nails since the middle of March and are having a bit of an identity crisis about it

Don't stress. Grooming less when in lockdown doesn't make it inauthentic

The fact that personal style is performance doesn't mean it's inauthentic, or less true

It just means it's communication.

And the same way you speak differently to different people, and you probably speak less when you're on your own, you'll dress differently on your own

(All that said, I do need to sort my nails out. My hands are making me really sad rn)