Today, I’m launching a new streaming platform Quarbi, which stands for Quarantine-Length Bites & all shows will be anywhere from 8 hours to 14 days long.

Our first show is called, “Waiting For a Hummingbird” & it’s about watching a flower outside my window & it lasts until a hummingbird shows up. There will be a new episode every day.

Another show we have is, “Can We Grow Lettuce From This Romaine Butt?” It’s not really a cooking show, but it could be eventually? That shit will go on for at least 14 days, possibly 30.

“What Should We Have For Dinner?” Is a cooking show that starts at about 10AM every day, give or take. It follows our cast as they fantasize about elaborate dishes we’d make if we have various exotic ingredients like eggs & ends when we eventually just boil pasta at 7PM.

If you have Quarbi pitches, please have your reps contact my execs. Our budgets are hovering at around $0/episode, but I will personally have extensive notes throughout the development & piloting process. We’ll obviously be looking to get these on the air by this afternoon.

“I d That One” is a show where we sit around/discuss a show from over 10 years ago that nobody else watched but that we liked, struggle to recall who was in it/what happened on it, but are still confident it was good. Premiere ep: “Ooh, KID NATION!” We guess where kids are now.