I'm trying to figure out what to write to my internship mentor about stress.

He wants me to write about how my stress can be reduced but I want to explain how everything stresses me (and I really do mean it).

#AllAutistics #ActuallyAutistic

If I don't have to do anything and can just sit and stare then my stress can be kept down.

But the second I plan something like getting a glass of water because I've forgotten to drink I get stressed! So my internship stresses me out a lot and these people don't understand that.

But the second I have to plan something things can go wrong. I have to spend a lot of energy concentrating to do something correctly, in the correct order, remembering all the steps. Planning this is stressful too.

And I do forget so I have to be vigilant in order to do things.

And the second I start to plan or do something I will be judged and people might think I'm doing something incorrectly or too slowly and that's scary and stressful.

As an autistic person that can does happen regularly.

Even if I'm alone doing the thing I am reminded of how someone would probably judge me and telling me off as I'm desperately trying not to throw my keys in the bag before locking the door for example (happened today).

So yes, about everything does stress me incl fun things I want to do because it's hard to do them correctly.

Writing this thread stressed me and having to figure out what to write to my mentor and caseworker is really stressful too.