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Long thread: Been playing a lot more mkw with more focus on my own "goals" of where I& #39;d like to be and how well I& #39;d like to do each time I play, but I& #39;m slowly realizing this is exactly why I can& #39;t really improve or have fun. This happens basically every time I play.
My definition of fun is only associated with "doing well". Anything you can think of. Score, teamplay, rank, MMR, TTing - name it and I& #39;ve thought about it. I can never be satisfied just playing. I have to feel like I did something worth value.
As an example, say we win a war. Everything worked out well, comms were good, team did well. But if I don& #39;t do well enough to my standards, I feel like I don& #39;t contribute anything. I never hold any high expectations for friends or teammates, but I& #39;m relentless with myself.
It becomes a cycle of holding those expectations, not seeing improvements and becoming extremely critical of every single thing wrong. I rarely ever take note of the good things I do. My accomplishments mean nothing to me.
I& #39;ve had people suggest breaks or just playing other games, but I know this really isn& #39;t the issue. This happens with everything I play, and it translates to a lot of areas outside of gaming (work, class, fitness, etc.) as well.
I know there& #39;s a lot of "imagine caring about ___" thing, but we all care about these things to different extents. If we didn& #39;t, we wouldn& #39;t do the things we do or make the choices we do.
Regardless, the hardest part of it all for me is taking everything and accepting them as is. I can& #39;t really change the mistakes that happen and I& #39;m never going to do anything perfectly, so the best mindset is really just based on improvement.
