My mom's journey of having a gay kid:

13 - "which girl do you like?"
18 - "wtf NO you can't be gay"
23 - "it's a big city thing, you'll get over it"
28 - "so how is your ~roommate~ doing"
33 - "...ok MAYBE you're gay"

today - "what do you mean when you say bottoming"

I explained it to her and she replied, "oh, so it's the one being like the girl."

She paused and then asked, "are YOU the girl?" I was honest and answered, "not typically," and shE FUCKING GOES...

"Yes, being girl must be harder because you always have to pretend to like it."

I went on to explain how queer sex dynamics are unique and said, "imagine how it'd be different if you were with a woman."

She scoffs, "NO, never," and when I prodded her further sHE GOES...

"Well if I was lesbian then I would probably just hold hands and GARDEN or something."