Short Thread.

This has been one of the longest months in the history of months. I have been trying to find the balance between keeping informed and trying not to get myself agitated and trying not to go mad https://www.nation.co.ke/lifestyle/saturday/Do-not-be-too-hard-on-yourself-now--survive/1216-5513408-sa4m2/index.html

I've also been pretty low on creativity and energy as have been many people than I know

It initially did not make sense to me as we're home all day. We shouldn't be tired from just relaxing, should we? https://www.nation.co.ke/lifestyle/saturday/Do-not-be-too-hard-on-yourself-now--survive/1216-5513408-sa4m2/index.html

But here's the thing, this is not a holiday and we're not just relaxing.

We're in the middle of a global pandemic and even you don't think it's affecting you, it is. You might not have active thoughts about it but your mind are body are feeling everything going on around you

There are two article I read which explained two angles to what we are going through and it helped me understand everything better.

The two articles are centred around grief and fear.

One, what we're feeling is grief. Grief doesn't only happen when we lose someone. There are different types of grief and what you're feeling now is one of them

Scott Berinato: "Yes, and we're feeling several different griefs. We feel the world has changed, and it has. We know this is temporary, but it doesn't feel that way, and we realise things will be different." Very very different and you don't even know how but you just do

"The loss of normalcy; the fear of economic toll; the loss of human connection. This is hitting us and we’re grieving. Collectively. We are not used to this kind of collective grief in the air.

And you're not "too strong" to feel grief. No one is immune.

The fact that we’re used to a minimum level of certainty in our lives about the basics and now it’s all been taken away from all of us at the same time. What makes it even worse right now is that it’s infinite and there’s no end in sight.

There's only so many challenges online and games you will play and movies you will watch before you eventually admit that you can't escape your feelings and that you have to deal with them.

The other thing you're feeling is fear. In normal situations when something attacks you, it's either fight or flight. But in this case, what you're scared of is invisible and there's nothing much you can do so what does your body do? It freezes.

You are scared. You are scared of death. You're scared of death of your loved ones. You're scared of losing your job. You're scared of a paycut. You're scared of being kicked out of your house, you're scared of not having food to eat tomorrow. You're feeling all of this, at once

You don't have to be productive if you're stuck at home and please don't feel guilty about it. You may have time but no one is in the mental space to do anything and it's okay. It's perfectly okay to just be

Please don't give in to internet and friend pressure about all the things people seem to be doing with all this "free time."

Take time to just be. Watch that movie, read that book, play that guitar, play with your kids and whatever else you can do each day and celebrate that.

Right now all you need to do is survive and that's a win in itself. Thrive