it’s sexual assault awareness month.

i have blamed myself for what has happened to me & watched my abusers live normal lives as i suffer in silence due to my anxiety, PTSD, & depression bc of what they have done. BUT i am a survivor. i will continue to use my voice & experiences to help other survivors.

at the age of 5 years old, i was first sexually assaulted. he never faced jail time. never got any type of punishment. & to this day, he lives life as a normal member of society. the things that man has done to me, haunt me to this day. i suffer from PTSD, which also causes me

to disassociate & have flashbacks almost everyday. my depression and anxiety get so bad, that i shutdown for weeks sometimes & all i do is sleep. by the age of 15 i had already tried to commit suicide twice. during this time, my abuser probably didn’t even think about me.

the second time i was sexually assaulted was just last summer. to this day, i still haven’t told my parents. mostly bc i don’t want to be blamed for what happened.

sometimes thinking about the things that have been done to me while i was vulnerable, make me wish i was stronger in that moment to put a stop to it. i hate to say it, but i do blame myself a lot. & i don’t think that will ever go away.

despite what happened, i can’t help but be thankful. bc without it, i wouldn’t be half the person i am today. some days are worse than others but some days i do feel strong. i want to be a voice for women and men who may feel the same things i have felt, & continue to feel.

you are never alone. if you have been sexually assaulted please don’t hesitate to dm me. i’d love to talk to you & help you anyway i can. we’re survivors & we’re strong.