Don’t get me wrong - I miss my late husband more than I can express - but in these times I can’t help but feel that with the situation we’re dealing with now I’m glad he’s not here to experience it. Or maybe the term would be tortured by it. 1/*

My husband was a C5 quadriplegic and I was his sole caregiver for 18 years. With COVID-19 both of us would need to be in complete isolation. I could never go out, no one could come in. I was strict about people who could possibly give him a cold, never mind this virus. 2/*

Burkhard didn’t have the ability to cough easily or efficiently. And immobile people are susceptible to having cold/flu turn to bronchitis or pneumonia quickly. 3/*

Nearly 5 years ago he did contract pneumonia, I had to have him brought to the hospital, and he was in the ICU for months. Intubating him was a nightmare because of his physiology. He nearly died while trying to save him. 4/*

But let’s say he never was one to get COVID-19. Just his normal care would be very difficult. On just a normal day the things that were needed for regular care are things that are now scarce. 5/*

His daily care required protective gloves and disinfection liquid. Lots of it. And we were responsible for procuring our own and paying for it. The €30 or so we’d pay for a case of 1000 gloves would be much higher now even if I could get them. 6/*

If he became ill and needed the doctor or even just regular wellness checks they made a house call. I feel certain in these days they still would, but every person coming in our home would put him at risk. 7/*

And what if he did contract COVID-19? Would he be brought to the hospital? Likely not since the outcome would not be good. He’d essentially would not be worth the effort to save. And he’d know that up front and I feel certain he would have made his peace with it. 8/*

It just makes me think of all the people out there now with profound physical disabilities and those who care for them at home. How they’re running short on gloves and masks disinfection products. How they’re having to reconcile themselves to not being worth saving. 9/*

If anyone out there is caring for a person for whom COVID-19 would surely be fatal, please know I feel for you. I know how frightened and frustrated you are. You’ve dedicated yourselves to caring for very vulnerable people. Hold strong and know you’re doing your best. 10/10