Still have this theory that '80s babies had the best musical trajectory. Born in the MJ/Whitney/Prince decade to parents who already had god-tier R&B, New Jack Swing childhood, golden-age MTV teen years, prime Biggie/Pac, elite white pop/alternative music, college bangers...

I lived long enough to see "is Mariah Carey black?" on the cover of Jet to see a whole comeback when I was an adult.

Old enough to remember when MJB was the butt of jokes on ComicView to watch her evolve into an Oscar-nominated auntie. Remembering when Eminem's first video hit The Box on channel 68 and thinking "who tf is this?"

Remembering one by one when (in this order) Britney, Christina, Jessica and Mandy hit the scene and seeing where they all are now. When "I'm a Slave 4 U" dropped and we knew Britney was on some new shit. That VMAs performance with the boa constrictor, watching it live.

I've had wine.