I've decided to watch WrestleMania 36. I don't watch any wrestling on television so I'm coming at this from a nearly blank slate. I'm going to do my best to understand what's going on based on what's presented in the screen. My knowledge of wrestling is as follows:

I was a kid of the 80s so it was nearly impossible to not be aware of wrestling at that time. My grandpa watched the WWF. Many of my friends watched it and had the toys. My parents simply weren't interested and, possibly, looked down on it as an entertainment option. (2/?)

I'm sure there was some FOMO but my jams were GI Joe, He-Man, and Voltron (yes, i did have the GI Joe Sgt. Slaughter), so I survived not having the toys Still it was impossible to escape. Wrestling was EVERYWHERE in the early/mid 80s. (3/?)

Even though I didn't watch wrestling I was aware of Hulk Hogan, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Rowdy Piper, Junkyard Dog, Andre the Giant, Randy Savage, Jake the Snake, Million Dollar Man, Mean Gene, etc. (4/?)

And I was definitely aware of the spectacle and marketing machine known as WrestleMania. If there was envy of my peers related to wrestling it was missing out on watching this major event. As time went on wrestling moved farther into my periphery. (5/?)

I still got splashed: Undertaker, Ultimate Warrior, The Rock, Steve Austin, Ric Flair, Hulk turning heel... But over the decades it has become easier to ignore. So why am I finally watching my first WrestleMania? (6/?)

1) I'm bored. 2) Hoodslam. A few years ago my wife brought me to Oakland's accidental phenomenon Hoodslam. It was exactly the sort of subversive, exciting entertainment I love and I immediately became a fan. (7/?)

3. Netflix's GLOW. I adore this series. It probably helped me understand the terminology of wrestling more than anything. Combined with going to Hoodslam a few times a year I had to admit mmmmaaayybbeeee I like this wrestling thing? (8/?)

4. A marketing experiment. Marketing is my day job and WrestleMania used to be a marketing vehicle to bring in new viewers. I'm curious if I, as a relative ignorant outsider, can watch WrestleMania and enjoy it even though I'm not steeped in the lore. (9/?)

After watching WrestleMania 36 will I want to take advantage of my WWE subscription and watch more? Will I want to start viewing the weekly shows (are they weekly?). We'll see. I'll do my best to tweet my understanding of what's going on in this thread. (10/?)

Oh, there's a kickoff show. I thought I had an hour to get ready. (11/?)

I sort of feel like watching this kick off show is cheating and violating my premise of going in blind. I'll be back in 36 minutes.

Okay, here we go. My first #WrestleMania which is apparently two nights! Is it pirate themed? Are they wrestling as pirates? Is every year themed? (12/?)

WrestleMania hasn't messed around with stars singing the National Anthem over the years. Wow, Aretha? Ray Charles? Little Richard? Classy. This supercut is an interesting idea but these key changes when stacked. (13/?)

Okay, so they're on pirate and viking ships. The darkest hour...is just before the dawn. And now Jesus is standing in front of horses. Some vikings with UFOs. A kraken. Is that supposed to be Sinbad? I'm excited about the kaiju. (14/?)

I think the guy they keep showing in the lime green shirt is John Cena. So far I don't recognize anyone else. Oh wait, that's the Undertaker. He's still wrestling? Isn't he in his 70s? (15/?)

Rob Grankowski is our WrestleMania host. He's apparently a football player which I know even less about than wrestling. He's standing kess than 6 feet away from this Mojo fella. (16/?)

We're starting with women's tag team championship. Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross vs. the champions The Kabuki Warriors. The announcer says it's a grudge match. Cross and Bliss want the title back. (17/?)

I admire the WWE for going forward without an audience. When I'm at Hoodslam I can't always hear the insults from the ring. If there's a legit injury we'll probably hear the bone break. (18/?)

Kairi Sane is hammerimg Bliss. Boot to the throat. That can't be legal. Asuka pulling her hair from the side of the ring. So the Kabuki Warriors are the heels? (19/?)

Nikki Cross almost pinned Asuka but Kairi off the ropes with "the Insane Elbow." I don't know if that's the name of the move or not. (20/?)

Wow! Cross and Bliss pulled it off. The new WWE Women's Tag Team Champions. Mostly thanks to Cross being immortal and Bliss delivering a "patented Twisted Cross." (21/?)

Next up is King Corbin. Does he have a kingdom? We're getting some backstory. 8 days ago Corbin knocked a guitar player named Elias (?) off a balcony. The King assumes Elias isn't coming. Uh oh, guitar strums! (22/?)

Elias is here. Who would have guessed? Elias smacks Corbin with a guitar before the match starts. Red struggles to get it started but there's the bell. (23/?)

I have no idea why Corbin tossed Elias off that balcony. Was he afraid of facing Elias in the ring? I feel like throwing someone off a balcony would lead to suspension or possibly arrest. (24/?)

King Corbin is yelling at the announcers. Now Corbin's yelling at the ref. Corbin's the heel, yeah? (25/?)

Elias with the win over King Corbin. Does that mean Elias is King now? How does royalty work in the WWE? (26/?)

This next bout looks intense. Shayna Baszler bit someone once. She's facing Becky "The Man" Lynch. Wow, according to these flashbacks they have some history! This one is going to be good. Becky drives a truck. She's leaving her truck running in the middle of the street. (27/?)

Becky Lynch is defending her title as RAW Women's Champion. I wonder if WWE considered canned cheering. (28/?)

Yikes! A fist fight has broken out at this wrestling match. Now they're both outside of the ring. Oof. Baszler's face into the announcer desk. Ow! Now into the steel steps! Brutal. (29/?)

Baszler is slamming Lynch into the announcer's desk. They're back in the ring. Lynch trying to turn it around. What? She does! No way. Baszler was robbed. That didn't make any sense. Do heels ever win WrestleMania? (30/?)

Next match is Intercontinental Championship. Daniel Bryan versus Sami Zayn - the champion. Bryan says "Yes!" a lot and Zayn loves fourth wave ska. (31/?)

Sami Zayn won't stay in the ring. He's playing mind games with Bryan. Also delaying my dinner. (32/?)

Bryan left the ring to get Zayn but Zayn's partners keep blocking him. Oh wait, someone named Gulag (?) Is taking out Bryan's partners. (33/?)

Finally! Bryan dragged Zayn into the ring. I don't think Zayn really wrestles? Bryan is pounding on him as he tries to talk his way out of fighting. (34/?)

Bryan through the ropes and ramming Zayn into the barricade. Now up on the ropes and missile dropkick. Zayn will fight at some point, right? Did he talk his way into the championship? (35/?)

Zayn is crying at WrestleMania but he seems to have turned this match around. Oh...briefly. now Bryan is kicking Zayn over and over again in the face. (36/?)

Oh, Zayn's coaches are back and they are pounding in Gulag(?). Bryan takes them down, on the top rope, but Zayn in his face with a kick. Zayn pulled it off thanks mostly to his coaches interfering. Okay, heels do sometimes win WrestleMania. (37/?)

Smackdown Tag Team Championship Ladder Match. Kofi Kingston versus the Jimmy Uso versus John Morrison. What happens if they break all of the ladders? (38/?)

Nevermind, there are a lot of ladders. I'd make a ladder pile.

...

Wait, if this is a tag team championship why is it three people fighting not in teams? (39/?)

There are so many OSHA violations happening during this WrestleMania Ladder Match. (40/?)

Woah, that Morrison parkour move from the top rope was cool. Now he's taking his sweet old time to set up the ladder. Weird to be thinking about safety...

Oh, that's why. Kofi leap frogging off the ropes. (41/?)

Impressive athleticism all around in this ladder match. (42/?)

Morrison's problem appears to be that he might have a fear of ladders. (43/?)

All three at the top of the ladders. They all have the titles. Morrison falls down onto the ladder below but makes it to the mat first so he wins by default. (44/?)

Next match is between a guy with a Jesus complex named Seth Rollins and his nemesis Kevin Owens. There's apparently a lot of history between these two. (45/?)

Sorry, had to go get dinner. All I saw was Seth smack Kevin with the bell. Kevin won by disqualification. ...

Ohhhh....Kevin's calling him back for a no rules match! (46/?)

This is getting brutal. Stairs, chairs...

Kevin off the WrestleMania sign. Wow.

Owens is victorious! I guess this victory will be important for Monday nights. (47/?)

The Universal Championship: Braun Strowman vs. the current champion Goldberg. We're getting close to the title card of The Undertaker (who I can't believe is still wrestling) vs. AJ Styles. (48/?)

To show how out of touch I am the announcers said Goldberg has been at this since the mid-90s and I have no idea who he is. Are wrestlers allowed to retire? (49/?)

Sheesh Braun Strowman is big. (50/?)

Wait, that's it? How was the Universal Champion Match the shortest match? I feel like that fast finish would have a bigger impact in front of an audience. The Monster lives. (51/?)

I'm excited to find out what a Boneyard Match is. It seems like a Boneyard would give the Undertaker an unfair advantage. (52/?)

Now I feel bad about criticizing the Undertaker's age in previous tweets because that seems to put me on the side of this AJ Styles guy. (53/?)

Okay, if I understand the story The Undertaker came back to wrestling as Mark Calaway. This is the big return to his original persona?

Nope that's AJ Styles in the coffin. Undertaker is on a motorcycle. Are the really wrestling in a cemetery? (55/?)

Yeah, this is the actual match. Hm. I have no idea if this is normal for WrestleMania but it feels way too much like a scripted scene from a tv show (yeah, I know, that's what WWE is). Would this happen if WrestleMania had an audience? (56/?)

Styles put Undertaker in the grave. Is this going to bring him back? (57/?)

Oh, yep, saw that coming. (58/?)

That was a weird last match for the first night of WrestleMania 36 but it made me chuckle. Is AJ Styles really dead? (59/?)

A couple people asked if I was going to tweet the second half of #Wrestlemania. The answer is yes. On Sunday I, uh, had a previous scheduled google hangout RPG session that conflicted. I've been avoiding spoilers and plan to get to it soon. Thank you for your interest. (60/?)