BIG THREAD TIME:
All 8 Harry Potter Movies assuming I don’t absolutely crash later today
All 8 Harry Potter Movies assuming I don’t absolutely crash later today
The opening scene at the zoo is funnier than I remember
Always found the storm island weird. Like who owns a stone house in the middle of an ocean off a coast?
They really started off with Hagrid’s character well. Made him extremely loyal to a fault
Lmaooooo Harry is stupid rich he really doesn’t need to magic to solve his problems. Which raises a question is there a wizard to muggle currency conversion rate?
Harry really has no choice with this chosen one crap
Petition to rename platform 9 3/4 39/4 because improper fractions are better
Harry has one conversation with Malfoy and Ron tells him Slytherin bad and instantly thinks he knows what’s good and what’s bad even after just learning he’s a wizard like a week ago
1. RIP Alan Rickman
2. Snape and other teachers are dicks like they’re first year students and I have no clue how’d they know anything unless they’re Hermione and actually study over summer like NERDS
2. Snape and other teachers are dicks like they’re first year students and I have no clue how’d they know anything unless they’re Hermione and actually study over summer like NERDS
First years literally aren’t allowed on quidditch teams for gods sakes can’t we just let him have a year to get acclimated to this giant world he just found out about
“Oh it’s the 3rd floor we shouldn’t be here we could die”
“Okay let’s lea-OH SHIT A CAT LET’S GO FURTHER INTO THE DEATH PLACE”
“Okay let’s lea-OH SHIT A CAT LET’S GO FURTHER INTO THE DEATH PLACE”
“Quidditch is bullshit counter”: 1
Can another player catch the snitch? Because think of it, the more people you have going for it the better your odds of catching it first and faster than the other team’s ability to score the quaffle, especially with enough defensive pressure
Can another player catch the snitch? Because think of it, the more people you have going for it the better your odds of catching it first and faster than the other team’s ability to score the quaffle, especially with enough defensive pressure
In my mind the rationale is the same as offensive lineman not being able to catch the ball
Get Harry Potter better effects budget please lord. It’s tough to imagine anyone else of these characters of course but whenever JK decides to cash in again they need to give to someone with straight BAGS
“Quidditch is bullshit” counter: 2
Idk if this schedule is accurate but of course Ravenclaw got the short end of the stick when it comes to scheduling
Idk if this schedule is accurate but of course Ravenclaw got the short end of the stick when it comes to scheduling
“Quidditch is bullshit” counter: 3
ENDING THE GAME NEGATES 15 GOALS
ENDING THE GAME NEGATES 15 GOALS
“Quidditch is bullshit” counter: 4
Are they seriously not allowed substitutes? Rosters are limited to 7 players? Because one the main balls literally is meant to knock out players and if you’re not allowed to have anyone else but a keeper guard the posts you’re gonna lose bad
Are they seriously not allowed substitutes? Rosters are limited to 7 players? Because one the main balls literally is meant to knock out players and if you’re not allowed to have anyone else but a keeper guard the posts you’re gonna lose bad
“Quidditch is bullshit” counter: 5
Absolute pay to play system. Speed/manuverability of broom is all that matters with some hand eye coordination.
Absolute pay to play system. Speed/manuverability of broom is all that matters with some hand eye coordination.
The material would be soooo good as a series man it’s ridiculous
And we could differ from the movies and get more of the nuanced stuff like the school life when all the action is quiet
And we could differ from the movies and get more of the nuanced stuff like the school life when all the action is quiet
I know I sound a lot like cinemasins but seriously their detention for going out late at night is to go out late at night
This is what I’m talking about wouldn’t it be great to show other quidditch matches considering it’s so important to Harry?
Also I highlighted something for no particular reason
Also I highlighted something for no particular reason

(But it’s also stupid to assume that Harry’s absence directly correlated to the loss. His role is completely separate from everyone else. Unless his QWAR (Quidditch WAR) is so high because he catches the snitch so fast everytime?)
Yes I did just make up Quidditch WAR. It’s 6:12 in the morning
Another note on a possible new adaptation. Obviously it’d be great to see everything cut from the books, but I’d like to see how they deal with everything we’ve already seen. Like the chess scene is pretty cool but how would they make it different?
Kinda hate myself for not knowing John Cleese was Nearly Headless Nick
Slytherin only won with 472 points? Over a whole year? Yet McGonagall deducts 150 in one night from her own house? Seems a little low
Neville Longbottom is the Chosen One damnit that theory is right
Make Daniel Radcliffe James Potter damn it I promise we won’t be confused
I need to make a Daniel of the Year akin to Barstool’s Blake
We don’t have many (especially in sports)
We don’t have many (especially in sports)
I don’t think I can rate these I love them all so much it’d be too biased
Sorcerer’s Stone is very very good and does a good job at introducing everyone’s characters and is an easy step into the world. It does a lot which is great for world building
Sorcerer’s Stone is very very good and does a good job at introducing everyone’s characters and is an easy step into the world. It does a lot which is great for world building
The birds are awake
There’s gonna be a lot of me saying GILDEROY LOCKHART in this movie’s thread
An icon
An icon
Harry: “let’s wait by the car”
A perfectly reasonable idea. Tell the Weasley’s whenever they get back that you couldn’t get through (no way they can’t get back out considering it’s not just them on the platform)
Ron: “FUCK THAT LET’S FLY THIS BITCH” Also did he even have keys?
A perfectly reasonable idea. Tell the Weasley’s whenever they get back that you couldn’t get through (no way they can’t get back out considering it’s not just them on the platform)
Ron: “FUCK THAT LET’S FLY THIS BITCH” Also did he even have keys?
“I am well aware of our bylaws Severus, having written quite a few of them myself”
Why the hell is the principal also a Senator?
Why the hell is the principal also a Senator?
Sprout just gave Hermione 10 points on the first day of classes yet no house even passed 500 for the whole year last year
GILDEROY LOCKHART
I’ll admit so far I’ve laughed more than the first movie
I’ll admit so far I’ve laughed more than the first movie
Robbie Coltrane is a damn good actor
Slytherin is up 90-30 and Wood flies high above the ground to tell Harry to watch out
GUARD THE GOAL POSTS YOU DOLT YOU CALL YOURSELF A TEAM CAPTAIN?
GUARD THE GOAL POSTS YOU DOLT YOU CALL YOURSELF A TEAM CAPTAIN?
Do you think there’s broom nascar?
Timmy and Tommy would love all these spiders
HOGWARTS HAS A PA SYSTEM?????
Dumbledore literally told Harry that Voldemort transferred some of his powers to him on accident. If Harry remembered this crucial line in Half Blood Prince when he learns about Horcruxes he should’ve been asking about whether or not he was one
Love how Lucius was totally cool with using the killing curse on Harry Potter right outside of Dumbledore’s office

Wait I’m sure there was a reason in the books(haven’t read em in a minute), but why in the movie would Ron and Hermione have some kind of rift? Like she was a cat, was in the hospital, then we see her again and she’s petrified.
Well Animal Crossing and breakfast is out of the way. Good morning to all of you waking up at a normal time. I hope you join me in Expectoing some Patronum. TAKE IT AWAY ERNIE.
You can tell we’re getting darker in tone because the WB logo looks way more sad
Richard Harris’ Dumbledore is amazing. He was so good at capturing the nurturing side of the character. I don’t feel like he gets enough credit. But he really fits in those first 2 movies, which feel very separate of the rest.
On that note, Michael Gambon really makes the role his own
1. The dorm scene of boys being boys is very good at establishing how Harry and Ron just have normal school lives despite being the heroes
2. Emma Thompson as Trelawny>>
2. Emma Thompson as Trelawny>>
When are our newspapers gonna be able to have gifs
Turn to Page 394
OKAY WAIT “QUIDDITCH IS BULLSHIT” COUNT: 6
1. Why was the snitch allowed to go that far if the dementors have that range
2. Harry wakes up in the hospital wing and asks who won the match, Hermione implies Hufflepuff won. BUT we saw Hufflepuff’s seeker struck by lightning...
1. Why was the snitch allowed to go that far if the dementors have that range
2. Harry wakes up in the hospital wing and asks who won the match, Hermione implies Hufflepuff won. BUT we saw Hufflepuff’s seeker struck by lightning...
...so if BOTH seekers are out and the only way to end the game is catch the snitch AND I’ve gathered that there’s no bench players, either a chaser is selected to become the seeker, or the game ending with Hufflepuff leading in goals scored
Which is BULLSHIT
Which is BULLSHIT
“Beautiful day today”
You can tell it’s in the UK because they say this yet they’re wearing light sweaters and it’s extremely overcast. No sun at all
You can tell it’s in the UK because they say this yet they’re wearing light sweaters and it’s extremely overcast. No sun at all
Hermione’s kind of a bitch
She took “when are we ever gonna use this” to a whole other level
And hogwarts doesn’t even teach calculus
She took “when are we ever gonna use this” to a whole other level
And hogwarts doesn’t even teach calculus
Instant redemption
Good shit, Emma
Good shit, Emma
Time travel is dumb man
It’s impossible unless you set up a ton of guidelines. The closed loop of this movie is very confusing to me
It’s impossible unless you set up a ton of guidelines. The closed loop of this movie is very confusing to me
This first scene with Sirius is fucking amazing
Other than the fact that Black and Lupin are being stupid for not coming out about Peter from the start
Other than the fact that Black and Lupin are being stupid for not coming out about Peter from the start
WHY IS GARY OLDMAN SO GOOD AT ACTING
Why don’t people ever cast normal spells? Harry throws a rock at Lupin and then just freezes up
Like dude hit him with something that’ll send him flying
Like dude hit him with something that’ll send him flying
LOOK AT THIS MASTERPIECE
So simple but focus on the lighting change as Harry goes from dreaming of a new life vs. when he realizes shit is gonna go down
So simple but focus on the lighting change as Harry goes from dreaming of a new life vs. when he realizes shit is gonna go down
Top 5 HP moment and it ain’t 2-5
Lupin has a great taste for playing music in his office
Also in the book I remember being sad about his departure. He was the best teacher Harry’s had and he of course cares for him being James’ friend
Also in the book I remember being sad about his departure. He was the best teacher Harry’s had and he of course cares for him being James’ friend
Prisoner of Azkaban didn’t have to go that hard. But it did. It did for us.
Not only is the tone implicated by the WB logo but now you CAN’T SEE ANYTHING ON THE SCREEN
I mean Jesus what is this the Battle of Winterfell
I mean Jesus what is this the Battle of Winterfell

Quidditch World Cup>>>>>>>
“QUIDDITCH IS BULLSHIT” COUNT: 7
The best seeker in the world is a high school student. Tells you something about the game
The best seeker in the world is a high school student. Tells you something about the game
THAT’S RIGHT HARRY POTTER’S FIRST CRUSH WAS A RAVENCLAW SUCK IT DWEEBS
Feel free to use this on any takes you disagree with
HARRYDHFIWWHGDEKNEEGOBLETOFFIYAH
Ron’s an a**hole
David Tennant is really good in this movie as a glorified cameo
The elder wand is by far the best designed wand in the series
RIP Cedric
WE’VE GOT A RALPH FIENNES SIGHTING
“DON’T YOU TURN YOUR BACK ON ME HARRY POTTER! I WANT YOU TO LOOK AT ME WHEN I KILL YOU! I WANT TO SEE THE LIGHT LEAVE YOUR EYES!”
Talk about commanding a scene god damn
Talk about commanding a scene god damn

Amos

Expelliarmus in the books: *disarms opponent*
Expelliarmus in the movies:
Expelliarmus in the movies:
The first of the David Yates Quadrology
I’ll try to see how these last 4 are similar to each other
I’ll try to see how these last 4 are similar to each other
“You performed the Patronus Charm in the presence of a muggle”
Says the talking letter right in front of a muggle family
Says the talking letter right in front of a muggle family

We now return to Gary Oldman stealing every scene he’s in
Albus literally shows up to the trial before it starts
Dumbledore: “The law states that magic can be performed in front of a muggle in life threatening situations.”
Fudge: “Laws can be changed if necessary, Albus.”
I’m sorry WHAT
Fudge: “Laws can be changed if necessary, Albus.”
I’m sorry WHAT
Umbridge is EVIL
“Progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged”
WHAT
“Progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged”
WHAT
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: the belief of fake news
Harry Potter and the Order I’d the Phoenix: the problems with standardized testing
Umbridge: “...will get you through your examinations which as you know is what school is all about.”
There you have it from the government’s mouth
There you have it from the government’s mouth

Minerva making sure she’s got the high ground at all times
Umbridge: turning Hogwarts into BYU
Hermione just took a pause before saying “Voldemort” when in Chamber of Secrets she says “fear of a name only increases fear of a thing itself”
HORMONES
Great acting from Daniel here
Gary Oldman did it again
Had to convince a 15 year old going through puberty that they weren’t a bad person. If that’s not a tough draw I don’t know what is
Had to convince a 15 year old going through puberty that they weren’t a bad person. If that’s not a tough draw I don’t know what is
Harry disarmed the cane part of what Lucius was holding
RIP Sirius
Oh baby here we go best fight of the whole series
THIS is where Gambon makes Dumbledore his own
His mannerisms in this fight are outstanding
His mannerisms in this fight are outstanding
After rewatching the first 5 they’ve actually done a good job throwing little hints at Ginny and Harry’s relationship
It’s not like it’s completely out of left field
It’s not like it’s completely out of left field